Nothing is Forever
by Dark-Angel-XX
Summary: Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito.rape.drugs
1. Chapter 1

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever.

D-Angel: Heya, here I am again with yet another Tai/Matt story for your enjoyment. It's a brand new story naturally, the idea came to me around a week ago and within half an hour I was typing out the first chapter! (I have a couple other ideas for taito stories that have been floating around in my head for 'months'. Will hopefully get round to writing those over the summer).  
Well, naturally this story will be angst filled, though it may be hard to believe considering how fluffy this chapter is. This story also has a kinda 'London estate' feel to it, which was inspired by _'Beautiful Thing'_ (Which is a wonderful British film about two young boys that discover love for one another, but are unable to express it freely due to family situations and such... And yeh, just go and watch it!).

The story is going to be narrated by Tai, not sure yet if I'll change the point of narrative in later chapters...

Alright, that's all I want to say. Please read on and enjoy!

**Rating:** **M** – Due to future events that will be mentioned or will occur in later chapters.

**Warnings:** Strong language, mature and explicit vocabulary (Here and there), naturally some guy on guy action occurring

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Chapter 1

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Yamato Ishida, my lover, my soul mate. Forever.

It does sound and feel weird when I say that, because he's my best friend. We've literally been friends since forever. We met aged six, when he moved in the apartment next door to mine with his father. Admittedly, my mother was the one that made me introduce myself to him. Even at that young age, I was slightly intimidated by him. Matt came across as amazingly cool, having funky blond spiky hair and eyes that were the exact same shade as the sky.

Though I was the one that asked him to be my friend, I soon claimed the role of leader. Matt was far more quiet and sensitive than he looked. I suppose that was the reason he became an easy target for bullies. At school he was pushed around the playground by older kids and taunted for his girly looks. True, Matt did have a slim frame and long girlish eyelashes, but to me he was still ultra cool. So, I stuck up for him. I beat the crap out of anyone that laid a finger on him.

By the age of nine, we were best friends. Inseparable, we were always together. I was either at his house, or he was at mine. My mother used to joke that we were like the male versions of Thelma and Louise, whoever they were. We would spend hours just lazing out on the sofa watching films or playing computer games. In the summer we would go to Odaiba, naturally dragging a few other friends along with us, to play football, have water fights and play all those silly games that little kids play.

Sora Takenouchi was one of those friends; I suppose she was my best female mate. For a girl, she was pretty cool. She was very much the rebel, hated anything girly and loved football nearly as much as me. Matt thought she was cool as well, though he still preferred to spend his free time with me.

The rumours started when we were eleven. People became aware that I was hanging around Matt all the time and that I still protected him from any bullies. I walked onto the playground one lunchtime to find that there was massive crowd near the water fountain. As I ran closer to the commotion the chanting became more clearer; ' Yamato's a fag! Yamato's a fag!'.

" Leave him alone!" I remember yelling as I fought my way through the crowd. One kid then said in a smug tone of voice; ' Here comes the troubled princess's gay lover'. I would have killed every single one of them for hurting Matt in such a cruel way, but at that moment my main priority was to get him to safety.

We bunked school for the rest of that day. Back at my apartment I cleaned and bandaged his wounds, then we rested on the sofa. I allowed Matt to snuggle up to me as we watched some lame black and white movie that was on television that was about some married woman that had an affair with a doctor, or something. I soon noticed that Matt was not watching the film. And that was the very first time I saw Yamato Ishida cry. It was a shock to me; Matt the cool guy, who's eyes did not even water when he broke his arm when he was ten (My fault, I dared him to climb up the highest tree in Odaiba park), or when he cut his knee open after falling down the nasty stone apartment block steps and needed three stitches, was crying his eyes out in my presence. I did not know what to say, so I just hugged him back and told him not to let the bullies back at school get him down. And, he never did ever again.

I noticed the physical and mental change in Matt when we became teenagers, but I mainly noticed our obvious differences. He was taller than me and was starting to catch the attention of girl's with his soft blue eyes, feminine shaped face and his wonderful golden blond hair. Where as me, I was still short and chubby with baby fat, and I knew for a fact that my brown eyes and wild mass of brown hair weren't what girls were looking for. I started to slowly envy his perfect slim but yet toned physique. Matt also found the love of his life. Music.

Me, Matt and Sora, who started to hang with us more, would spend most days relaxing at each other's houses. We'd usually help Matt compose songs, which he would sing in his gentle voice or play on his guitar. Though, I enjoyed spending time with Sora, I preferred spending time with Matt, alone. I guess it was then that I started to question my sexuality. I had never been attracted to a girl before, ever. Not even Sora, who was maturing into a beautiful young woman.

" Hee hee, you fancy Sora, don't you?" Matt teased on several occasions. I would always come back with a disgusted look followed by ' No way, she's like a sister to me!'. Matt would just roll his eyes, then resume strumming the strings of his guitar.

I grew more curious about my sexuality. I clearly was not into girls, and I would find myself 'accidentally' walking in on Matt when he was getting dressed or undressed in his bedroom. On one occasion, Matt walked into the bathroom in my apartment to find me standing in my boxers in front of the full-length mirror, examining what I thought was my still pre-teen body. I was hardly bothered, though, Matt had seen me in my boxers thousands of times.

" I'm still a flabby little kid," I complained as I prodded my own stomach. I was surprised when Matt shook his head from side to side. He then stood next to me and started to discard his own clothes, until he was down to his boxers.

" Look, your stomach is far more toned than mine will ever be," Matt explained, pressing his warm hand against my belly for a few seconds. I blushed evidently as his hand made contact with my skin. I quickly muttered something about being cold then grabbed my jeans before hurrying out of the bathroom.

Matt touched me in similar ways on a number of occasions after that. Whether they were accidental or not, I still noticed them. From a simple squeeze of the shoulder, to bodily contact that was made when we would play fight on the living room floor. It soon became a regular thing, for us to play fight.

Shortly after my fourteenth birthday it was apparent. I was gay. The thought of getting it on with guys turned me on, while the thought of getting with a girl actually repulsed me. Matt on the other hand had already been out with nearly all the girls in our year at school. I felt so jealous when he told me about his first kiss, first proper kiss with tongues and his first hand job from a girl who had the reputation of a slut. Matt being Matt would tease me about not ever having a girlfriend. I joked back one time and said in a camp voice that I would much prefer a boyfriend. He had replied with, " I'll be your boyfriend any day." I thought he was joking, so I laughed it off alongside with him, though I saw a disappointed glimmer in his eyes.

It's actually quite odd how you remember the exact date and time of your first kiss. Mine was 15th July, at 23.44pm. I was in my room, bored out of my mind when my mum came into the room holding the phone.

" It's your twin," She sighed as she threw the phone onto the bed next to me. I started to speak to Matt once she had left the room. He sounded as if he was on the verge of tears, all I heard was something along the lines of girlfriend, hates me, get round here now. I was quick to rush next door. Matt opened the apartment door, his face all tear stained.

" What happened?" I asked as I followed him into his room. His main light was switched off; the only source of light was coming from his small bedside lamp. Matt crawled onto his bed and threw his covers on top of him, before I joined him, though I lay on top of the covers.

The story was at first rather typically filled with teenage angst. His girlfriend had basically dumped him because he would not sleep with her, or something. Then suddenly Matt went silent before he whispered to me that he had something to tell me. I listened in pure interest.

" The reason why I've dated so many girls is because I don't want people thinking I'm… Gay," He nervously explained. My eyes lit up, while one of my eyebrows raised with curiosity.

" But I got scared earlier on, Chi, when Ai said that she wanted to go all the way," He continued to say. He paused again before he lowered his eyes to avoid my eye contact, before he said clearly in a decided voice, " I don't ever want to sleep with a girl because I am gay."

I watched as he turned his head to the side in what looked like shame before he sighed out loudly in frustration. Everything then started to sink in. My best friend was gay. He was like me! I suddenly didn't feel all alone and different. I wrapped my arms around him and told him that everything was fine. My over excited behaviour may have been the thing that gave away my own secret. Matt studied my face for a few seconds before he asked, " You too?" I nodded. A small tear then fell down my face, which Matt wiped away with one of his thumbs. Then he leant forwards. My whole body tingled with excitement as his soft velvet lips brushed against my own for a few seconds before he pulled back, shyly. My heart melted when I saw his stunning blues sparkle with happiness.

My first kiss was with my best friend. Heh, I had a lot of firsts after that. But, after that Matt and I crossed over the line of friendship and we became boyfriend and boyfriend. It hardly had to be discussed. Sora was first to know about us. She said, with a grin, that we could have not made it any more obvious that we fancied each other like crazy. Other friends soon found out shortly afterwards, none of them were disgusted or freaked out. It felt nice to be accepted.

Then, my mum found out. As usual, Matt and I were making out on my bed when she walked into the room. I literally threw Matt off me when I saw her standing at the doorway, eyebrows raised slightly. My eyes were wide with fear as she glanced back and forth at us. Then the silence was broken.

" About bloody time!" She sighed, before winking at us. She then turned around and left the room with a smile on her face. My mum, abso-fucking-lutely the greatest mother in the whole of Odaiba! Officially! Who needs a father as well when I've just got her? My dad walked out on my mother and I shortly after my little sister died. Yeah, I had a sister. Her name was Hikari. She was a beautiful and cheerful baby; despite she was born with major heart problems. Bleh, I can't remember those days very well because I was four or five at the time. Anyway, she died shortly after her first birthday. The strain was too much for my father, so he left. I haven't seen him since.

I'm sixteen now. I guess I'm average height for my age, around five foot nine. I'm said to be a 'looker', but I only have eyes for my boyfriend. Yamato and I have been together for two years. I know for a fact that he is my soul mate. We are meant to be together. Forever.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

His lips eagerly pressed themselves against mine as he slammed me against the wall. I sighed out. I just loved it when he kissed me like that. His hands slipped underneath my football shirt as my tongue brushed against his own. My arousal grew as he teasingly traced his fingertips against my nipples. His arms then wrapped around my waist as he pressed his body right against mine. My body was shivering with anticipation. I wanted him to go down on me right there and then.

" Ishida Yamato! Yagami Taichi!" A loud voice suddenly boomed. We quickly pulled away from each other and turned to face our headmaster, who knew our names all too well. Matt smoothed out his school shirt as I ironed down my football top with my hands.

" How may we help you, Mr. Fuji?" Matt asked in his gentle sexy voice that was usually enough to turn me on. God, he was such a rebel. Truly only he, and maybe me, could get away with talking to our headmaster in such a way. Mr. Fuji was truly a dragon; he would give the younger children detentions for just respiring. The older kids were usually given detentions for doing something natural, like laughing.

" What do the school rules state about kissing in school premises, Ishida?" Mr. Fuji, the vein on his head started to twitch uncontrollably, as always. I always thought that someday his head would explode, or something.

" Sir, surely you can't expect me to remember all billion of the school's rules?" Matt replied back cockily, he cheekily rested his hand on my ass causing me to jump a little before I blushed and smiled sheepishly. Mr. Fuji was certainly not smiling; he was turning an unhealthy shade of purple while his hands curled into tight fists.

" The rules state that pupils that are in a relationship must show their affection towards one another _outside _of school premises!" His eyes then narrowed, " Just because you two are homosexual it doesn't mean that the rules are any different for you."

Honestly, did that asshole think we expected a fucking goody bag because we were gay?

" If I catch you two kissing again on school premises I will be forced to send letters home to your parents," Mr. Fuji threatened, " Do I make myself clear?"

It annoyed me when teachers added that onto the end of all their threats. They know that we can't say 'no' because we realise that we would get a detention. Matt and I muttered yes wishing that would piss off so we could continue with our kissing session. The old man gave us a poisonous look before he waddled off back down the empty corridor. Matt then cheekily pinched my rear before he winked sexily at me; he then bent down and picked up our school bags.

We walked back to our apartment block, holding hands as always. A few people gave us funny looks, mainly old people that were raised up in the 1940s where they had to repress all their feelings and such resulting in their lack of open minds.

" I forgot to ask, how was football practice?" Matt asked as we walked through Odaiba Park. I had football practice after school on Wednesdays and Fridays. Every Wednesday, Matt watched me during football practice, where as on Fridays he stayed after school to rehearse with his band mates. No matter what day of the week it was, we always walked home together, unless one of us was ill or something.

" Oh, football practice was great, as usual," I said enthusiastically, " Coach, says I'm getting better."

" Mmm, I think he's right, you're becoming more athletic looking as well," Matt purred, he caressed my hand with his own making me grin nearly from ear to ear. I loved it when Matt was in a horny mood.

We soon reached our apartments. Matt planted a small kiss on my lips before he whispered in my ear and reminded me that his dad was on a business trip and wouldn't be back until Monday. He then lightly pushed me against the wall between our apartment doors and started to kiss me. Opened mouth with no tongues, but it still felt great. He then ran his hand against my cheek before he stepped back and allowed me to breathe properly again.

" I'll grab some clothes from my apartment and I'll be around in a few," I explained, moving away from the wall before walking over to my apartment door.

" Ok, Chi, but be quick… Mister Banana is sad because he misses your loving," Matt joked. His hair somehow did that hot swaying thing as he spun around and blew me kiss.

Around ten minutes later, I walked into Matt's apartment with a bag containing my clothes. I was still in my football kit because I had decided that it would be easier for me to have shower and change into my clothes round Yama's place. As soon as I had kicked off my trainers and had placed my bag on the sofa, Matt's arms wrapped themselves around my waist. He rested his head on my shoulder for a few seconds, as if mocking the fact that he was slightly taller than me (five foot eleven).

" I want to go all the way," Matt then softly said to me. His hands then slipped into my football shorts. I whimpered out in pleasure as he started to stroke me slowly. I shut my eyes as he told me to tilt my head to the side before he started to kiss me gently, this time with tongues. He then ended the kiss when he realised I was on the verge of coming. He stepped back, sliding his hands out of my shorts, which caused me to frown.

" Bedroom?"

" Bathroom, I need to get cleaned up before we do anything," I explained. It was a known fact that no guy smelt very pleasant after an hour of football practice.

" Ok erm.. Hey, let's shower together," Matt suggested, he grabbed my hand and started to drag me towards the bathroom door. I pulled off my top once we had stepped inside the rather small room, which had a sink, toilet, bath and shower, like most bathrooms do actually. Matt turned on the shower, adjusting the temperature so it was just right.

" Yama, I don't really want to 'do it' in the shower," I explained. Hey, it wasn't as if I didn't find the whole concept of having sex with Matt in a shower a turn on, it was just that I wanted my first time to be on a bed. I told Matt that and he laughed softly as he pulled off his school tie, then unbuttoned his shirt and tugged that off as well.

" Don't worry, Tai, I won't do anything you don't want me to," He reassured as he wrapped his arms around me. I snuggled up close to him and shut my eyes.

So we showered together for the first time. He behaved, well…to an extent anyway. He washed me, but his hands ended up lingering between my thighs. Once he had finished 'washing' me, I washed him. He moaned out sweetly as I ran my hand up and down his length as the water pattered down onto our nude bodies.

We were both still hard when we stumbled out of the shower. Matt and I kissed again, before we grabbed a towel each and wrapped it around our bodies and rushed out the bathroom, holding hands and giggling like two girls that had just spoken to a guy they fancied. Into the bedroom we went.

My boyfriend sure did look totally hot with his darkening blond hair-dripping wet, with a white towel hanging loosely of his slender hips. He stood there and posed for me for a few seconds. I then had to carefully move one of three guitars Matt owned off the bed before I sat down. My heart started to slam hard against my chest as Matt allowed his towel to fall to the floor, revealing his sexy naked curvy body. He then knelt down on the floor in front of me then unwrapped the towel that was wrapped limply around my own waist.

" Mmm, yummy," Matt whispered as he forced my legs apart and moved his mouth close to my arousal. I moaned out loudly as his lips wrapped themselves firmly around my erection as he started to suck me off at a fast pace, before he slowed down and allowed his hands to play with my testicles.

" Ahh… Yama… Aahh!" I sighed out. A very pleasant feeling started to engulf my body as his tongue ran its way around my length. He happened to be very good at giving head. I was unable to hold back for long. My face burnt with embarrassment as I came. Matt just simply swallowed and grinned, and then he licked my seed off his lips

" You always taste so sweet, Chi," Matt said in a dirty tone of voice, once he had cleaned me up with his tongue, he then stood up and walked towards the chest of drawers that rested at the foot of his bed. I tilted my head to side slightly in curiosity.

" I thought you wanted to go all the way," I reminded as I lifted my legs up onto his bed and stretched out my body slightly.

" I do, but there is no hurry, and I bet you're feeling hungry," He explained as he pulled out a pair of briefs from his underwear drawer. I could not help but smile. Though he was a rebel, and a very sexy one indeed, he was still the same sensitive Yamato I had known for years. Not one to rush into doing something if it involved other people. He always made sure that he knew what they wanted to do before he acted upon anything. I loved him for being like that.

" Yeah I'm hungry, so get your sexy ass over here and give me something to nibble on!" I demanded, finally unleashing my dominating fury. Well, I was hardly going to let him be the only one to get a tasty snack now, was I?

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

D-Angel: So, what do you think? I was surprised with how fluffy this chapter turned out to be. Not sure if I have Tai's character spot on, but hey, I wanted to write in a first person point of view for a change and a challenge. Well anyways, I'm still writing chapter 2, guessing it will be finished in a few days time (My exams are now finished so I have some free time), so it should be posted up next week.

Anyways, thanks for reading! Please review! (Constructive criticism welcome, pointless flames won't be taken seriously).

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

D-Angel-

10/06/05


	2. Chapter 2

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Thanks for all the reviews so far and obviously thanks to all the reviewers! I'm quickly going to answer a few questions;

**KomiLoccness:** I haven't even decided if Mimi and Koushiro are going to appear in this story yet! The main couple in this story are obviously Tai and Matt so I very much doubt I will be focusing much on other couples.

**Katten: **Oh, this is one question I cannot answer. All I can say is the whole issue of who's the uke and the seme will actually be a reoccurring theme in this story.

**Jul: **Thanks :). Sorry to say that things ain't gonna be all sunshine, lollypops and rainbows in this story. As for 'Plane Wrecked', the reason why it's disappeared is because it was on my old account, which was annoyingly deleted by fanfiction (dot) net because some asshole reported me. No worries though, I plan to jazz it all up before I post it back up on this account ;).

That's about all. Now, time for chapter 2 and may I warn, things will be get quite angst filled from here onwards.

Read on and enjoy! (Or at least try, lol).

**Rating:** **M** – Due to future events that will be mentioned or will occur in later chapters.

**Warnings:** Strong language, mature and explicit vocabulary, scenes of a sexual nature (Watered down though for you naïve people out there), slight violence

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Chapter 2

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Sex. A three lettered word that can easily start or kill a conversation in the blink of an eye. After having my 'snack' Matt and I got dressed into our clothes (Obviously!) before we grabbed a half full packet of popcorn (Which was rather stale may I add) from the back of the cupboard and then snuggled up on the sofa to watch a film. It was a boring love story about some middle aged woman that was bored with her husband, so she ended up having an affair with a young bloke from across the street, or something.

" Tai, we have discussed the topic of sex before, right?" Matt suddenly asked out of the blue. I turned my head to side and looked at him with a slight worried expression on my face. He sounded like a bloody mother or something that was about to tell her child about the facts of life.

" Many times," I replied once my face had returned to its normal expression. My hand then dug into the popcorn bag, causing me to pull a sad face when I realised that all the popcorn was gone.

" You know how I want you to be my first?" He continued to question.

" Naturally, Matt, you are my lover after all," I said, before pressing my body closer to his.

" And you're my one and only, which is why tonight, if it's ok with you, I want to show you just how much you mean to me," Matt sweetly said, he laced his fingers around mine and gave me a pure affectionate smile that instantly made my heart melt like butter on a hot frying pan. I hardly had to think about whether or not I was ready to sleep with Matt. Even though we were both sixteen, young and perhaps foolish, we definitely knew what love was and were certain that we wanted to share this particular first together.

" Of course it's ok with me!" I said with a grin. I nuzzled my head into his chest as he started to run his fingers through my hair. I shut my eyes and listened to Matt's soothing heartbeat while he watched the rest of the film.

" Hey wake up sleepy head!" Matt's soft voice said. I groaned in annoyance and rolled onto my stomach as I placed a cushion over my head. My boyfriend chuckled softly before he grabbed the cushion then sat on the edge of the sofa.

" Ngh.. How long have I been sleeping for?" I asked still sounding very drowsy. I sat up and rubbed my eyes.

" Around two hours," Matt explained, he then gently ran his hand against my cheek. I shivered in pleasure as his hand made contact with my face. I roughly grabbed his wrist and pulled him near me before I planted a rough kiss on his lips. A wide smile appeared on his face as he pulled back.

" Feeling feisty are we?"

" Naturally," I said, I then pouted and shut my eyes before adding in a babyish tone of voice, " So come on, kiss my brains out, Yammy!" Matt laughed again; he absolutely loved the babyish nickname I had made up for him around a year ago. Since some people (Sora) had started to call him by the first nickname I had made up for him (Yama), I had invented the name 'Yammy' for him, which strictly only I was allowed to call him.

Matt snaked an arm around my waist as he leant forward and attached his lips to mine. I moaned softly as his tongue brushed against mine, slowly and teasingly. He then started to nibble on my lower lip while his hands started to pull up my t-shirt slightly. God, he was a brilliant kisser, he knew exactly what sort of pressure to use at the right time and his lips were all lovely and soft.

" Bedroom?" He panted once the kiss had ended. I watched as he climbed off the sofa and looked down at me with those amazingly seductive blue eyes of his.

" Lets go!" I said hastily as he helped me off the sofa.

The springs on Matt's bed immediately creaked as we both jumped onto the bed. He started to kiss me again, a little more wildly. I could sense his excitement. I placed a hand on his cheek before tracing my tongue around his hungry lips. He sighed out lightly and half shut his eyes. I then moved my head back a little and gazed into his eyes for a few seconds hopelessly. He smiled warmly and traced his thumb across my lips before he moved his hands towards his t-shirt. I reached for my own t-shirt and pulled it off while he chucked his onto the floor carelessly.

We then wrapped our arms around each other, before we kissed and spread ourselves out across the bed. The feel of bare flesh together felt very nice, a sensation that is hard to describe unless you know what it feels like to have someone you really love press half naked up against you (For those that do not know, it is _really _nice!). I dominated my blond haired beauty by rolling on top of him, before I started to confidently kiss his neck. He withered in delight as I carefully sunk my teeth lightly into his skin to give him a love bite. I then brushed my tongue along his collarbone enjoying the taste of his skin; it was kind of like fresh summer strawberries. My hands started to ease their way down to his jeans. My tongue then teasingly flicked against the piercing on his left nipple, which I found a total turn on, making him sigh out in pleasure.

His jeans were soon lying on the floor, and mine were quick to join his. He pinned me down then wasted no time as he groped my arousal through the material of my boxer shorts. I shut my eyes and moaned out rather loudly as his hand started to rub me. His lips closed around my own for a few seconds before he started to pull down my boxers, slowly easing them past my thighs. Admittedly, I was feeling a little nervous, and I could sense that he was as well, though he'd always been better at hiding his emotions than me. I just wished that sometimes he would express how he was feeling, rather than just keep it all behind that ice mask of his.

It was clear in his eyes that he was feeling slightly uneasy. He pulled off his own underwear in silence while I watched. I don't think it is necessary for me to explain how amazingly hot he looked as he kicked off his boxers then turned around to face me.

" Err, Tai, could you look in that drawer besides my bed?" Matt asked as he ran his fingers through his blond hair. I nodded, before I reached over and gripped the handle to his beside drawer and tugged it open.

" What exactly am I looking for?" I asked, rather densely as I started to rummage through the drawer. After I had pushed aside a few unwanted CDs and a few folded up letters, my fingers were soon hovering over a packet of cigarettes. Obviously Matt was a smoker. I used to be too, until my mum caught me smoking on our apartment's balcony one day. She ended up telling me this story that I'd rather not repeat which discouraged me from even looking at a cigarette ever again.

" They should be underneath the fags," Matt explained as he started to massage my feet. I soon came across what he wanted me to find, a packet of condoms. So very sensitive and caring was my Yama. I remembered when I had pulled a muscle in my leg during a game of football shortly after I had turned fifteen. Matt literally spent all the time he could looking after me, helping me relax and easing the pain while massaging my injured leg and other things, heh.

" There should be some lubricant in there as well," Matt added rather shyly, as he crawled over to the same end of the bed as me. I handed the packet of condoms to him before I started to search through the drawer yet again for the other item we needed.

I wondered if everyone's first time was like this. You know, that nothing goes smoothly. In a story or something things such as condoms and lube would have appeared out of nowhere, there would candles all around the room and the one who's about to be _done_ (who's laying on the bed blushing heavily) would say to the _doer_,'oh, please be gentle with my beautiful virgin body!'. Then they would basically fuck in every position known in the kama sutra.

Obviously, in real life, no one's first time is like that. And if it is then may I just say that person is a lucky bastard.

I soon managed to find the tube of lube. My body was aching in desire as I watched Matt roll on a condom, though I was slightly peeved that he was going to be the seme. If I hadn't been so turned on and in love with him, I would have fought to be the _giver_ rather than be the _receiver_.

We had both decided on standard missionary position (basically me on my stomach with him _mounting _me) for out first time. The whole thing felt weird at first seeing as neither of us knew what it was going to be like. Naturally, Matt had made things easier on my part by stretching me with aid of the lube, but he still spent a few moments not moving so that I could get used to the rather foreign sensation. Then, the movement began.

" How does it feel, Chi?" Matt said, in a deliberately low husky voice. I'll tell you how it felt, it felt fucking amazing, despite the fact it was over in less than five minutes. Due to the excitement and partly to his nerves, Matt whimpered out my name before releasing his load. I was barely half way to climaxing.

" Chi, I'm so sorry, I couldn't hold back…" Matt explained sounding so guilty, as if he had committed a serious offence. He planted a kiss on my cheek before he climbed off me so he could dispose of the used condom. I remained quiet, which was probably a massive worry for Yama. He joined me back on the bed as quickly as he could. I was now lying on my back with an unknown expression on my face.

" I'm sorry, Chi, I'll make up for it," Matt promised, " Right now."

My Yama kindly stimulated my hard-on with his mouth and massaged me with his heavenly fingers until I came. I guess it was better than nothing.

After that Matt curled up against me and sweetly said to me that I was the best thing that ever happened to him. It was difficult for me _not _to cry when he said things like that. It's strange, both Matt and I have different outlooks on crying. I believe that crying is perfectly natural, like love and jealously. It's a brilliant way to express how you're feeling, whether its happiness or sadness. Matt, on the other hand, believes it to be a sign of weakness in one's self. Yeah Matt was one to believe that big boys should never cry.

There was a slight pause of silence once Matt yet again apologised for coming too quickly.  
" Tai, say something, your lack of speech is scaring me," Matt said in a half joking tone of voice, though I could sense he was slightly worried.

" I'm just trying to savour this moment Yama. Our first time," I said in reply as I lazily shut my eyes and pulled him closer to me. Oh it was nice having his naked body pressed against mine.

" I wanted it to be better for you," Matt said softly, his voice laced with slight regret. I pushed my lips against his own and kissed him slowly, my tongue was soon dancing with his sending amazing tingly sensations around every inch of my body.

" It was our first time, Yammy, I wasn't exactly expecting orgasmic explosions," I sighed once we had finished making out fervently. My lips then curled up into a sly smile. " But," I added, " If you're feeling _that_ guilty about it then I guess you can always make up for it next time!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

Matt did make up for it the next time we had sex (which was the morning after our first time together). Talk about orgasmic explosions! But, it was then that things started to change. The changes weren't exactly bold and obvious, like my mum's new boyfriend's bright yellow and purple hair, but they were clear enough to notice. Oh, and by _things _I don't just mean the relationship Yama and I shared. Things in my family life were becoming a lot different. My mum was making secretive phone calls and she would quickly end these calls if I happened to walk into the house. However, I heard my mother mention my father's name and my sister's name several times as she talked to whoever she kept making these calls to.

The following fortnight, after losing my virginity to Matt, I was climbing up the apartment block stairs, absolutely exhausted from playing football in the park with a few mates. As I started to walk down the walkway I was surprised to see my mum leaning against the wall opposite our apartment door with a cigarette in her mouth. I watched as she ran her fingers through her shoulder length mousy brown hair in the similar way Matt did when he was stressed out over something or another. Her eyes seemed to be fixed desperately on the darkening blue sky, looking as if she was hoping to suddenly grow wings and fly away from everything.

" Mum?" I questioned once I reached where she was standing. Her body jumped out of shock, and the cigarette in her mouth fell out from between her lips and tumbled hopelessly over the wall she was leaning on. My mum turned around to face me.

" What Taichi?" She asked me in a half frustrated voice that had a slight edge of shock to it. I was slightly taken aback by her rather uncaring tone of voice; never before in my life had my mum spoke to me in such a way before. I was about to reply back, my mouth was just about to open when she spoke again.

" I'm fine, Tai, just getting some air," her voice sounding all warm and mum-like causing me to physically cringe at her fake tone. I knew she was lying. There was something wrong, obviously, but I realised that she did not want to tell me.

" Whatever," I murmured; turning around before I found my feet instinctively walking towards Matt's apartment door.

" He's not in," My mother explained, her voice causing me to pause in mid-movement, " I saw him leave the apartment twenty or so minutes ago."

That was another shock to me. Matt had said nothing about going out that afternoon. We had even arranged to go to the cinema later on to watch a new action film I was desperate to see. I quickly reached into my short's pocket and yanked out my mobile phone, however I learnt that I had not received any texts or phone calls. A sickening feeling lurched through me; I started to seethe with anger. How dare he just go out like that without even bothering to tell me!

Without even thinking of reasons why he may have popped out of his apartment for a while, I found myself running back down the apartment block steps. My mum's voice, which was yelling my name, started to fade the further I ran down the steps. Strange images started to flash through my mind; Yama with another girl, Yama with another _guy_. Oh God, I was worried! Yama being attacked by thugs, Yama being cornered by a group of filthy old men and... It was then that I collided straight into something. I thought I'd run into a lamppost or something, but turned out I had ran into a person.

" Whoah! Chi, watch where you're running!"

I was dazed from our collision and admittedly I was feeling pissed off beyond belief. Hearing his soft, startled, sexy voice was practically the icing on the cake for me.

" You bastard!" I hissed, before I thoughtlessly threw my fist towards his surprised face.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

D-Angel: Ohh, cliffhanger! And oh my, that was such an eventful chapter. Now, the lemon was watered down and I do plan to write a more explicit one ;) Leave your e-mail if you would like me to send it to you. I wanted to be a little more realistic, which is why their first time wasn't intense orgasms all round. There will be a few more 'naughty' scenes, some may be rather shocking and far from being romantic and 'awww' worthy.

Still, I am thoroughly enjoying writing this story! Writing in a first person point of view definitely makes a refreshing change!

Well, chapter 3 is currently being written and that will hopefully be up in a week or two. Not sure how many chapters there will be in total; I usually don't set myself an estimate until I realize that the story is nearing its end.

Anyways, enough rambling, thanks for reading and please review! (Again, constructive criticism and questions welcome… Pointless flames won't be taken seriously).

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

-D-Angel-

30/06/05


	3. Chapter 3

_**Nothing is Forever**_

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Heya, and thanks for all the reviews so far! Glad that you guys are enjoying this story :). No questions for me to answer, but I have something to say to a couple of reviewers;

**Tamika DanarDraco: **Apologising for not sending you the 'un-watered lemons' just yet. Still have to actually write them! I'll try and send them to you before the end of July. And woo! I am pleased that you love this story and my writing style :D _–Huggles-_

**Strat6: **Again, about the 'un-watered lemons'; haven't wrote them yet, blah, blah, you know the drill :P . And yes actually this story is kind of turning into a soap opera (Only somehow I think it's better than East Enders, God that soap's turned crap!). Things are definitely going to become a lot more interesting ;)

Again, big thanks to everyone else that reviewed! Here's a rather long chapter 3 (Kinda got carried away when writing it, heh).

Read on and I hope you will enjoy…

**Rating:** **M** – Due to future events that will be mentioned or will occur in later chapters.

**Warnings:** Strong language, violence, scenes of an 'adult' nature (Again, watered down to suit those that feel offended by two hot guys getting it on).

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Chapter 3

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Ok, so perhaps punching him in the face was a tad harsh, but at the time I was overwhelmed with rage. I don't like hurting people in any way, especially with the use of my fist, unless they happen to hit me first or are hurting any of my friends. I can't help having a short fuse! I just get wound up too easily at times. Believe me; I didn't want to hit my own boyfriend.

Luckily I snapped out of my anger trance when my fist was barely millimetres away from Matt's nose. It was too late to pull my fist back, but I managed to throw my hand of course so that it struck his left cheek with hardly any power. His head turned to the side due to the impact of my punch, his mouth was wide open with shock as he stumbled back a couple of steps towards the edge of pavement.

I watched as his stunned blue eyes suddenly glazed over with what looked like a thin sheet of ice. I suppose it can be described as his sudden transformation from shock to anger. Those eyes of his were amazingly dangerous; they were the only part of him that actually showed any true emotion half the time, so when they were frozen over with what I can only describe as a delicate layer of ice, he was pretty much hiding away everything he felt in an imagery shell.

Breathing rather heavily, I witnessed his eyebrows crease inwards; his teeth gritted together as well. Damn, I had _really _angered him; well duh, since when had he taken me kindly all the times I had hit him in the past? Oh. I guess I kinda forgot to mention the fights Matt and me had had when we were younger. I suppose I wanted to believe that our relationship and friendship was flawless; which is naturally far from the truth. Truth is that nothing is perfect, no matter how special it is.

Well, he leapt at me somehow managing to tackle me to the ground with barely any effort. I grunted in pain as my back hit the pavement, then uttered out discomfort again as his body crashed on top of mine. I frowned in irritation as he grabbed me by my shirt collar and pulled my upper body away from the ground. I then received the smack around the face, which I guess I deserved. It surprisingly hurt like hell.

" What the hell is your problem, Tai?" Matt's distressed pierced through the air once he had punched me, his grip loosened slightly on my shirt but I realised he was not too willing to let go of me in a hurry. 'What the hell was my problem?' Jesus, he had some guts to ask me that when _he _was the one that had just suddenly gone out without telling me.

" You!" I hissed back. I grabbed hold of his wrist and managed to pull his hand away from my shirt. The moment I replied back to him, I saw the ice barrier that was protecting his eyes suddenly shatter. A confused glimmer appeared in those beautiful blue eyes of his as his mouth half opened out of shock. God, I really did not know how he managed to look sexy even when he was in a confused strop with me.

" Don't give me that innocent Bambi look, Yamato! I just learnt from my mother that you left your apartment half an hour or so ago, without even telling me." I explained with an angered tone to my voice as he continued to stare at me in surprise, " Have you forgotten that tonight we're meant to be going out together?"

Matt stared at me blankly for a few more seconds, as if I was a crazy, gibbering, drunken old man. Then, the layer of ice returned. He roughly and rather harshly slapped my hand away from his wrist before he stood up and stared down at me.

" Taichi you really need to stop suffocating me and let me do what I want!" Matt snarled through his gritted teeth. I stood up quickly, though I stumbled slightly once I had got to my feet. A small sarcastic smirk suddenly appeared on Yama's face.

" I went out so I could get some money out from the bank for tonight."  
Suddenly, I felt stupid. Immensely stupid. So he hadn't gone off with someone else, or hadn't been attacked by pervy old tramps, but I was still annoyed at Matt for not texting me to tell me where he had actually gone.

" Anything could have happened to you, Matt!" I snapped back, I took a step towards him. I felt hurt when he backed away from me, seeming very uneasy. He saw my look of hurt but I could tell that he did not feel at all guilty.

" I'm a big boy, Tai; I am capable of walking to the bank by myself!"

The coldness in his voice immediately sent chills down my spine; I never did say that he was not capable of walking anywhere; I was just worried that someone would hurt him! He was always the target for bullies at school, well up until a few years ago when he had suddenly become rather popular.

" Stop fucking clinging on to me like I'm your property!"

Each word he said were like daggers to my heart.

" It annoys me when you think that _you're _the one who has to be in control of everything…"

I had to interrupt.

"… Don't be stupid! I was just…"

"… Being overprotective? As always. You think I'm incapable of looking after myself!"

That was far from what I thought. Matt was probably the most independent teenager I knew. For the past eight or so years of his life Matt's dad had hardly been around to look after Yama because of his 'busy' job as an IT technician. I have actually lost count of the times that Matt's dad had announced that he was going away on a business trip for a few days, and the amount of times that he's had to work overnight is unbelievable. It must really suck having a father like that.

" No, Yama…" I stepped towards him again, only this time he pushed me back. I frowned. I hated it when he wouldn't let me get near him. I started to shake slightly in frustration, like an alcoholic that was deprived of booze.

" Don't even think about coming near me! You hit me!" Matt growled in bitterness, his hand ran across his reddened cheek before he flinched in what was obviously pain. I then instinctively traced my own fingers against my aching cheek before I made eye contact with his glaring blue orbs.

My mind started to panic a little; what if I had now totally screwed up our relationship? We'd hadn't had a fight this bad since I had accused Matt of flirting with one of his band mates a few months ago; one minute we were yelling and attacking each other then at the next we were kissing with passion as if nothing happened. Somehow, this time, I could not see us kissing each others faces off.

" Well.. Yeah.. You deserved it!" Great, if I had not already dug myself a grave already there is now was (Complete with a tombstone). I felt one final dagger plunge into my heart as he gave me a pure look of filth, that was capable of un-blinding someone that was already blind before blinding them again. Then, he uttered the words that everyone who's in a relationship dreads to hear.

" I..It's over, Taichi Yagami."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

Word of advice; never watch television when you're attempting to take your mind of anything. It does not work. When I returned to my apartment after my argument with Matt, I slumped down on the sofa without speaking a word to my mum who was in the kitchen. I glanced at the TV and frowned when I saw a young teenage couple snogging and fondling with enthusiasm as if mocking to me ' Ha, look what you're going to miss out on!' I grabbed the remote and changed the channel.

_" The__ male lion will stay with his companion for life…" _

Great, all I needed to see was a smug lion mount his more than willing lioness. I turned the TV off, my timing being impeccable because my mother suddenly came out the kitchen to see how I was. I was quick to jump off the sofa and retreat to my room swiftly with my mum on tow.

Once I had shut the door, I collapsed on my bed and immediately buried my head in my pillow, perhaps hoping in vain that I would suffocate. A loud rapping on the door caused me to sigh out loudly in frustration. Sitting up quickly I wiped the tears from my eyes before my mum walked into the room. She took one look at me before sighing out sympathetically. My mum was sitting on the edge of my bed by the time I had blinked again.

" Let me guess," My mother said as she wrapped her arms around me in a comforting manner, " You've had an argument with Matt?"

I choked back my tears as she pulled away from me to allow me to reply without sounding like a lamb that was being smothered.

" Worse. I hit him," I whispered back; I felt a couple more tears trickle down my face, " And then he hit me back, and then we started arguing in the street, and then he said our relationship was now over."

My mum carefully wiped the tears from my eyes as she told me to calm down. I was shaking and shivering, feeling afraid that I would never get to see or make love to my Yammy ever again. I loved him _so _much. I felt extremely bad for punching him; perhaps I had overreacted slightly.

" Well, sitting here and crying isn't going to do any good! I reckon you should go round there _now _and apologise," My mum explained, obviously getting bored of me blubbering like a six year old who had just fallen over and scraped his knee. She gave me one final squeeze before she sat up and walked out my room saying that she was going to make me a cup of green tea. As if a cup of bloody green tea was going to suddenly cheer me up. 'Oh, the world is about to end? Never mind, I'll make you a cup of green tea!' Mind you, my mum does rule at making green tea.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

My hand nervously hovered in front of the Ishida residence door, readying itself to tap against the wooden material that was covered in blue flaking paint. It was very late, almost midnight to be precise. There I was standing outside Matt's door, wearing an old pair of jeans and a football top that was too big for me. My hair looked like crap, and I was trying to formulate in my mind what to say to Matt.

I had visited Sora earlier. She had heard of the fight through Matt who had phoned her shortly after he had returned home. After saying I was an idiot and a foolish fool, she advised that I should immediately make my way round to Yama's house (She actually said Yama!) and say sorry for being annoyingly overprotective. I personally thought that Yama still should have told me that he was going into town to get some money out, but I decided not to tell Sora that.

So what was I going to say to Matt? 'Oh! Sorry for being an absolute dick! Please take me into your arms and kiss me passionately like they do in those cheesy romance films!'. Hmm yeah how smooth. Somehow I doubted that would woo Matt. I was never good at preparing things in advance, which is why I decided in the end to just knock on the door and see what would happen.

I stood there stiffly and awkwardly once I had moved my shaking fist away from the door, my ears solely listening out for any movement coming from the other side of the door. After a minute or so had passed I took a small step towards the door then pressed my ear carefully against the cold surface. I could not help but smile slightly when I heard the soft strumming of guitar strings and a wonderful angelic voice accompany the sweet sound.

_If you only once would let me  
Only just one time  
Then be happy with the consequence  
With whatever's gonna happen tonight  
Don't think we're not serious  
When's it ever not  
The love we make is give and it's take  
I'm game to play along_

Yama enjoyed singing in English; sometimes he would translate the lyrics for me though I just preferred to hear them in English.

_All I can say  
I shouldn't say  
Can we take a ride?  
Get out of this place  
While we still have time_

I immediately recognised the chorus. Matt had sung that song as his previous gig, even though it was not a song that he had written. Jimmy Eat World was Matt's favourite English band and he dreamt to meet them someday. He believed that their song lyrics were full of meaning and that he could relate to many of their songs.

_Can't say I was never wrong  
But some blame rests on you  
Work and play they're never ok to mix  
To mix the way we do_

Yep, some blame did rest on me. I swallowed deeply before I knocked against the door, louder than I did before. I heard the sound of Matt sliding his hand back against the strings of his guitar, obviously in mid strum. He had definitely heard me bang on the door this time. I stepped back from the door as I heard him fiddling at the catch from the other side. The tension was actually killing me. Finally the door clicked and then slowly creaked open, like they do in creepy horror films.

Damn! The moment I saw him half of my brain immediately stopped working. My ability to speak was annoyingly part of the half of my brain that had ceased to function at that particular moment in time. He looked so fucking fine standing there in nothing but a low cut pair of baggy jeans. His amazing slender and muscular torso was on display, my eyes being automatically drawn to the sexy piercing on his nipple. Then, I starred up at his face. His expression said it all. Those gorgeous lips of his were literally a thin straight line and his eyes were full of anger.

I was relieved when the dead side of brain suddenly came back to life. My mouth opened to say something, before I realised that his hand was heading directly towards the door. I refused to let him just slam the door in my face, so I was quick to grip the doorframe with on of my hands to stop him from shutting the door fully. However, I soon realised what a mistake I had made by using my hand rather than my foot when the heavy wooden door crunched painfully against my fingers. I cried out in agony as he quickly pulled the door back open realising that he had trapped my fingers in the door.

"Shit," Matt gasped in panic; he quickly glanced behind me before he grabbed my arm and dragged me into the apartment. My fingers were aching and I was certain that a couple of them were broken, damn Yama for trying to close the door on me!

" Baka," He sighed in a mixture of worry and aggravation as he led me into the kitchen and towards the sink. He hurriedly twisted the cold-water knob so that ice cold water gushed harshly out of the tap directly into the empty sink bowl. Matt then gripped onto my wrist and placed my fingers into the stream of freezing cold water. I whimpered out in discomfort as the pressure of the water gushed against my swollen fingers. He sweetly turned down the flow of the tap water for me.

I was surprised when one of his hands suddenly rested itself on my hip. He moved right up against me and studied me with his cold blue eyes.

" Matt..."

Oh! His lips were suddenly pushed against mine and my eyes were opened wide out of pure shock. It's always the way isn't it? You're about to confess that you've been a complete asshole when suddenly you get cut off in mid speech somehow, commonly by a kiss. Ok, so maybe it's not _always _the way, but it seems to be ordinary in most romance stories I have read. Er, not like I read romance novels often.

But back to the kiss, which was strangely enjoyable despite it was kind of clear that there was tension between us. Somehow, his lips felt softer than before making me wonder if he used some sort of special moisturiser on them. I allowed his tongue to brush against my own, not even feeling put off when I faintly tasted the bitter tang of tobacco in his mouth. His hands were now resting on my backside giving me a good groping. My legs actually started to turn to jelly (Well obviously only metaphorically speaking), and Yama was quick to support me when I almost collapsed to the ground.

" Your hand still needs sorting out," Matt then explained, pulling away from me so he could turn the tap off, acting as if he had not even kissed me. Once he had found some bandages, and some odd substance in a tube that just had the 'I smell bad' look written all over it, we ended up sitting on the living room sofa. As I had suspected, the stuff in the tube did smell awful but on the plus side it helped reduce the throbbing emitting from my fingers.

" Yama?" I muttered sheepishly as he carefully bandaged my hand, he was even biting down lightly on his tongue in pure concentration, which made him look amazingly cute.

" Mmm hmm?"

" I've been a dick, haven't I?"

"Yep."

Me and Matt always had those kind of simplistic conversations after an awkward argument or disagreement. I guess most people do actually. Commonly after a few one word answers one person will suddenly come out with a bloody Oscar speech full of ninety percent actual meaning and around ten percent bullshit. That lucky person happened to be me.

" Well I'm sorry, it was wrong of me to hit you just because you went out somewhere without telling me. Guess I was just worried that someone would hurt you," I then looked down at the ground and smiled sarcastically, " Then I go and hurt you myself, how bloody ironic is that? I deserved that punch back from you…" I looked up and saw that Matt was actually bothering to listen to my petty Oscar speech. Whatever sensibility I had before suddenly vanished when I jokingly added, "… But slamming my fingers in the door! Come on! Was that even necessary?"

His mouth started to twitch, then, yes! Success, he was smiling. Well, only for a few seconds because then he was starring at my bandaged hand sympathetically.

" I feel _really _bad for hurting you too," Matt softly sighed while running his fingers through his blond hair, which never seemed to get messy, unlike mine, " I did say some really stupid things and I'm sorry for saying them."

There were a few minutes of uncomfortable silence. My eyes were glancing at Yama'a favourite guitar which was leaning against the arm of the sofa. I had been with him when he had bought that guitar, I remember seeing him grin like a kid in a candy store when the woman at the counter handed him it all wrapped up in pretty paper. It had cost him around a hundred and twenty thousand yen and he had been saving for it since literally forever. What I loved most about it was the beautiful metallic blue colour which strongly reminded me of Matt's eyes; the very same eyes that I realised were now staring seductively at me. I felt my jeans suddenly become a lot tighter.

" Err.. I'm just going to…" I began to say as I stood up, I could feel my cheeks turn red as I hurried towards the bathroom. However, when my hand was about to reach the door handle, I heard Matt's feet pad quickly against the floor as he chased after me. His arms were quick to cascade around my waist from behind.

" Chi, don't run away from me, I still love you," He whispered into my ear as his hand fell towards the bulge in my jeans. Oh God, oh God; I just about melted into his arms when he said the wonderful 'l' word. Soon, the cruel things we had said and had done to each other earlier on slowly faded away into the night. I withered as he touched me and moaned as he made love to me on his bed. I'm not sure why it is, but sex seems to be more intense after an argument. We both realised just how foolish we'd been by almost throwing away a relationship that was nearly flawless. Or so I thought anyway.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

Waking up with Yamato's warm body pressed against me was always a great way to start the day, so naturally I was a little peeved when I realised I was the only one laying in Matt's very comfy bed. I lazily rolled over and sniffed the indented spot in the mattress where Matt had been sleeping and smiled when I smelt his gorgeous body scent.

" Chi? Why are you sniffing the bed?" A half tired voice questioned curiously. I sat up quickly, smiling even more when I saw my sexy boyfriend leaning against the doorway only wearing his black dressing gown. I became intrigued when I noticed that a white sheet of folded paper was clutched in Yama's right hand.

" What's that?" I asked, shuffling slightly across the bed as Matt came over to join me. Once he was sitting besides he grinned as he excitedly unfolded the piece of paper, which turned out to be a letter. I tiredly tried to skim read the tidy and sophisticated handwriting, but soon gave up doing so after the first few lines. To be honest I was more eager to reach the bottom of the page to see who the letter was from.

_Takeru_I'd heard Matt mention that name before…

" You know of Takeru, my little brother?"

I nodded vaguely.

" You get to meet him this summer! He's coming over here to stay for a couple weeks!" Matt excitedly exclaimed which actually scared me slightly but at the same time made me grin in happiness. It was always pleasing to see Yama all excited and happy, because sadly it was a rare sight which was almost becoming extinct.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

_Song lyrics- _

**"Work" **by Jimmy Eat World

D-Angel: No cliff hanger this time, just some slight angst. I guess the purpose of this chapter was to demonstrate the strong bond of Tai's and Matt's relationship, which has started to crack slightly. Writing this chapter actually made me so depressed that I had to actually write a rather fluffy scene in one of my other stories to cheer myself up, heh. Well, more about T.K in chapter 4 which should be up in a week or two (around the time of my birthday!).

Thanks for reading anyways! Please review (Constructive criticism is always welcome, flamers are never taken seriously).

See you next chapter!

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

-D-Angel-

15/07/05 (14 days until I'm 17! Eek! I'm getting old!).

P.s. I didn't really have the time to proofread this chapter, so I apologise for any grammar or spelling mistakes (if there happens to be any).


	4. Chapter 4

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: I still live! Barely. Year 13 is very stressful :(. Only _just _finished this chapter today, but it's a little short compared to previous chapters /. But hey, it's a very important chapter. No questions to answer, just a message for…

**Tamika DanarDraco **and** Strat6: **I'll send you those un-watered lemons by the end of the week! (They're not all that good though, lol)

And also thanks to those that wished me happy birthday! It was a grand day, even if it was over two months ago now.. lol.

Also, thanks very much to all that have reviewed so far, muchos appreciated! Now go forth and read!

**Rating:** **M**

**Warnings:** Drug usage, implicated sex, guy on guy loving (obviously) :P

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Chapter 4

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I forgot to mention that Matt had a brother. He was four years or so younger than Yama and I, but from what Matt told me he was apparently very mature and smart for his age. He was always getting top grades and had plans to become a lawyer.

I could not help but feel sorry for Matt though; he rarely got to see his little brother. His parents got divorced when he was six and Takeru was only two. Matt was forced to go off with his dad while Takeru had to stay with his mum. Depressingly, Matt's mum was not so happy with the idea of her rebellious eldest son, who lived with her 'disgraceful' ex-husband, seeing her precious baby boy.

"She thinks I will corrupt his mind," Matt had bitterly muttered to me one day when we were ten or eleven. I was sickened by the fact that his mum thought such a thing. Yama was smart to realise that his mum didn't really care about him; she hadn't sent him a birthday card since his ninth birthday. I knew exactly how he felt though, having a father who had walked out of my life when I was just a little kid. It was different for Matt, though; his mum would phone him from time to time, but only to inform him whether he was allowed to go and visit Takeru or vice versa. Sadly, the answer had always been 'no'. The last time Matt had actually seen his brother was at their grandmother's funeral when Matt was fourteen. Yama returned home looking troubled and on edge, and I naturally gathered that the reason was because Matt realised he was not going to see Takeru again for a long time.

" His girlfriend is coming over to stay as well, you know?" Matt explained to me from the kitchen, as he made us breakfast. As well as being amazingly sexy, a talented musician, intelligent and just generally incredible, Matt was also a brilliant cook. He used to make such mouth-watering dishes, which he could have easily served in those snobby posh restaurants, where they give you four different types of spoons, knives and forks and expect you to know which one is used for what.

"I'll have to give him the old 'big brother' discussion," Matt joked (Obviously not about the reality TV show called Big Brother), as I stretched myself out across the sofa in the living room and then glanced briefly at the blank TV screen.

"Does he know that you're dating a guy?" I asked curiously when I heard Matt walk into the living room to check if I was still conscious. I knew that Matt was not openly gay around his family; his dad was a tad suspicious but just concluded that Matt and I were very good friends, and I knew there was no way in hell Matt would have told his mum about his homosexuality.

"No, "Half-sighed Matt as he approached the sofa, then sat on the arm of it," But he knows that you're my best friend."

"We're a little more than best friends though," I purred, suddenly feeling slightly horny. Matt shivered evidently as I sat up and ran my hand along his bare thigh, which happened to be on show because all he was wearing was his God damn incredibly sexy (And very short) pink apron (It was also admittedly rather cute having pretty frills around the edges of it). I pulled a face of disappointment as he slid off the arm of the settee and told me that he had to flip the bacon over.

" Yama, you can't expect me to not to get a hard-on when you're wearing that little apron of yours," I sighed as I dreamily watched him drift back over to the kitchen, focusing more on his hot, perfectly shaped butt than anything. It was apparent that I sometimes had a one tracked mind. But then again I was a guy. He laughed gently before he disappeared back into the kitchen.

So Takeru was unaware that Matt was going out with me. As we ate breakfast Matt announced to me (Soon after he started fussing over my injured hand again) that he was going to tell Takeru about us when he came over to stay. I reassured him that his little brother would accept his homosexuality, though there was a strange glimmer in his eyes that told me that he was unsure.

o-o-o

The first phone call I received, that made a huge change in my life, was on the last Tuesday before the summer holidays. My mum was not in at the time; she was out working, and Yamato was reluctantly spending some quality with his workaholic father; so therefore I was all alone napping on the couch. The television was on, but I had muted the volume because the sound of animals having sex with one another was quite a distraction.

My eyes snapped opened abruptly when the sharp shrill of the house phone suddenly pierced the atmosphere. I lazily stretched my arm over to the phone, which was on the small coffee table next to the sofa then pressed the accept call button.

"Hello? Yagami residence, Taichi Yagami speaking," I half yawned into the receiver still feeling sleepy. The voice on the other end of the phone suddenly perked me up.

"Hey, sexy. Thought I'd phone you while my dad went to the bathroom," Matt explained as I sat up and adjusted the pillow I had been sleeping on, while resting the receiver between my shoulder and ear. He started to tell me about the film he was watching with his dad, which happened to be one of my favourite James Bond films (Yes I love my films, especially English ones) called 'Goldfinger'.

" I would rather be spending time with you," His hot voice whispered down the phone as I curled my fingers around my glass of water, which was resting on the coffee table, before I took a sip of the quenching clear liquid. I then asked if he could sneak around here to give me a good seeing to.

"I'd love to because…Ah shit, he's coming back in," Matt's voice sighed in a whisper, " I'll talk to you later."

"Have fun," I replied disappointedly before he hung up. I placed my water back onto the coffee table before placing the phone back into its holder. Barely seconds after I had put the phone down the object had started ringing again. I rolled my eyes thinking that Matt obviously could not get enough of me. I instantly snatched the phone from the holder as I stood up and walked towards the kitchen as I pressed it against my ear.

"Yagami residence, a very horny Taichi Yagami speaking." I was about to open the kitchen door until the person on the other side of the phone spoke.

"Taichi? Is that you? Tai?" The voice was vaguely recognisable, though I could not match it with any faces. All I knew was that the person was definitely a man and I guessed he was middle aged by the maturity that was evident in his voice. He kept repeating my name as if I was a sacred God or something. Somehow, after a few seconds of silence on my side, I managed to find my voice.

"Yes. Who's speaking?"

"It's Ray Yagami. Your father…"

My eyes widened. I loosened my grip on the receiver out of pure surprise so that it fell out from my hand and silently hit the carpeted floor. I then slowly edged away from the phone, eyeing the silver object as if it was dead corpse. The man on the other end of the phone echoed the word 'hello' in a confused tone of voice as I gradually made my way towards the phone holder. My arm was shaking as my hand reached towards the reset call button, still staring at the phone with disgust, before I lightly pressed it. The haunting sound of the man's voice vanished and was replaced by the sound of my heavy breathing.

I was in a physical state of shock and anger as I slumped back down onto the sofa. _He _had phoned me- the man that had dared to call himself my _father_. I felt sickened, I wanted _nothing _to do with him and I had even stressed that fact to my mum. Obviously that message had never reached him. I stared at the television screen, which annoyingly and very ironically was displaying some cheesy advert where a young boy was having a jolly good time fishing with his dad. I sneered at the fake display before I grabbed the remote and switched the television off. Sitting in complete nothingness was better than watching _that _tortuous sight.

o-o-o

I told Yama about the surprise phone call the following day at school. Nevertheless, he was shocked and agreed that my father had some nerve to call me out of the blue after walking out on me like he did. I tried not to go on about the phone call all day, knowing that Matt lacked a high tolerance level. I realised deep down his opinion was _'Big deal he phoned you, get over it!' _but he was too damn kind to me to say such a thing (Unless he was _really_ pissed off at me).

After football practice we went back to his, after buying a large bottle of cider from our nearby local shop. I knew that cider really wasn't his thing; he was more of a heavy spirit sort of guy and frowned down upon 'weaker' alcoholic drinks. As for me, I was content with my beer and cider.

Yamato grabbed two pint glasses from one of the kitchen cabinets, before telling me (or more like ordering me) to pour out the booze. I pulled a small face of irritation; I disliked being bossed around, though I was more likely to obey if the person ordering me was Yama. He disappeared almost stealthily from the kitchen, which slightly aroused my suspicions (And other things, heh). Sadly, he didn't reappear with anything kinky; in fact, he didn't even bother coming back into the room. So I ventured into the living room with our drinks smiling when I saw Yamato standing by the table with his back to me, his perfect ass just waiting to be slapped.

I placed both glasses down on the table surface before I rested my hand on his rear while allowing my other arm to snake around his waist. I then peeped over his shoulder and frowned with curiosity when I saw him cutting a small chunk from a block of some weird greenish brown substance with his penknife. My hand snuck into his trousers, then slipped slowly into his underwear. He casually continued to cut the substance into smaller chunks as I stroked him. I then watched as he rolled the chunks up with a sprinkle of tobacco into a joint before he suddenly spun around and kissed me forcefully on the lips.

" You have to try some of this," Yamato whispered into my ear- his erratic breathing making me immediately hard. I gave his erection one last squeeze before he pulled away from me and then grabbed his lighter from the table. Once he had lit the joint he handed me the lighter before he took a drag of what I knew wasn't a regular cigarette.

"I don't smoke anymore," I firmly replied as he offered me a drag, reminding myself of the rather disgusting story my mum had told me to put me off smoking. Matt chuckled softly then almost gagged on the smoke he had inhaled before waving the roll-up in my face.

"It's less damaging than tobacco," He explained as he ran his fingers through his spiky hair for a few moments. My gaze slowly fell down to the spliff in his hand; I now had a faint idea on what other substance was mixed with the tobacco. I had sworn to myself that I would never take drugs a few years ago when I was warned by my mum of the dangerous effects they had. However, peer pressure is a thing that's very difficult to fight, and Yamato was sometimes too damn persuasive for his own good.

" First time users usually don't feel anything," Matt explained as I reluctantly took a drag of the spliff. It had been a while since I'd last smoked, so I almost had a coughing fit as the fumes tickled my throat before absorbing into my body. It was exactly like smoking a regular cigarette, except it had a rather vile aftertaste that made me grimace. Matt then took the spliff from me before inhaling more of the drug into his lungs. It then hit me that this obviously wasn't the first time he had smoked weed before.

"When did you first try this stuff?" I asked. We were now slouched on the sofa cuddled up to each other, still sharing the joint we'd been smoking for the past fifteen minutes. I felt so calm and relaxed, though I should have felt angry that Yamato had taken drugs without me knowing. Yamato laughed again in a mellow tone before he caressed my hip with his fingers.

"A couple weeks ago, I think," Matt said as he started to slide his hand underneath my shorts. Not much was said after that. His lips were against mine and a pile of clothes suddenly appeared on the floor. I stubbed the joint out against the arm of the sofa (which was covered in cigarette burns anyway) and allowed Yama to have his wicked way with me. Yamato would get stoned most evenings after that. I joined in sometimes, though it usually made me feel sick. I had no idea where or who he was actually getting the drugs from, even asking him several times.

"Just some dealer who hangs around here," Matt would say while sitting cross legged on his bed, rolling out a few joints as casually as I was eating the sandwich I had made. I gazed over at him, my boyfriend, and studied him out of pity. I was unable to understand why Yama relied on those drugs so much. Hadn't I'd been enough to support his problems? And not to mention all the support he got from our friends. He didn't need drugs; he was much stronger than that, but he chose not to believe.

o-o-o

D-Angel: Little for me to say. It's all rather obvious right now; Yamato's becoming a drug addict and Tai fails to understand why. It's all so sad :(. Naturally, more shall be revealed in the next chapter which I've already started (yey!). I predict and hope that Chapter 5 will be out sometime at the beginning of November, though I seriously have some _major _revision to do for my January retakes! So please, no threatening to kill me if I don't happen to update for a while!

Thanks for reading anyways! Please review (Constructive criticism is always welcome, flamers are never taken seriously).

See you next chapter! (Whenever that may be)

o-o-o

-D-Angel-

17/10/05

P.s Apologising for any grammar or spelling mistakes… I am my own beta, which is never a good idea… heh


	5. Chapter 5

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_ Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Another instalment in time for Christmas! I finished this chapter the other day anyway and just needed to edit it a bit before I posted it up here ;)

Oh, a message for:

**Tamika** **DanarDraco: **Those un-watered lemons will be your Christmas present! I promise this time! Don't be mad at me for taking so long with sending them… I'll throw in something else too ;)

Also, thanks very much to all that have reviewed so far, I love you guys very much –_glomps-._

Please read on and enjoy!

**Rating:** **M**

**Warnings:** Drug usage, major angst, guy on guy loving ;)

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Chapter 5

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I was relieved when summer finally arrived, marking the end of another stressful term at school. Yamato and I celebrated by jumping into bed together the moment the last school bell rang. After a hot and steamy sex session, we decided to plan out what to do in the month or so we had off school. He reminded me that Takeru and his girlfriend would be coming down in a few days and then also mentioned something about an upcoming concert for his band. At that point the phone call from my father was the last thing on my mind; mainly because he hadn't called back since and I had been more worried about other events.

Yamato was taking drugs regularly. He was still smoking cannabis and had recently started to take speed. I was becoming very anxious, especially when I noticed he'd lost half a stone in weight. It didn't look very appealing on his tall frame (He was nearing six foot at the time), but it seemed that I was the only one that noticed his sudden loss in weight. Mind you, he always used to wear baggy t-shirts and jeans to try and cover up his naturally slim body anyway. I really disliked the way he always tried to hide things. Things that were actually really hurting him.

I made my way over to his place at midday on Monday (The first 'official' day of the summer holiday). Because I now practically lived at his apartment he'd decided it was only right to give me his spare key, so I naturally let myself into the apartment without knocking. I was feeling a little excited knowing that, as per usual; his dad was on a business trip or something (Yamato had, by this time, stopped listening to his dad's excuses) so Yamato was all alone.

"Yammy? Where are you?" I asked as soon as I had shut the front door and kicked off my trainers, I then stepped into the living room before I loudly announced, "I have come to give you the fucking of your life!"

The grin on my face soon faded and was immediately replaced by a surprised cringe-worthy expression when I noticed two unfamiliar people sitting on the sofa, staring over at me with stunned looks on both their youthful pre-teen looking faces. I could feel the heat prickle against my face when I noticed that Matt was standing by the kitchen doorway, blushing like never before. The heavy awkwardness in the atmosphere was clear as I nervously placed one of my hands on the back of my neck before I quietly laughed in an uneasy tone.

"Is that how you usually greet my brother?" The blond haired boy on the sofa asked, a small grin crept along his face as I glanced over at him in curiosity. Yamato looked ready to kill me, but I just continued to make my way into the room until I was standing by the two people on the sofa.

"Well no," I started to say feeling Yamato's dangerous blue eyes burning into the back of my neck, warning me to shut up. "Usually I'll just take him against the wall with no warning," I said slyly. I looked back over at Matt at winked at him, causing his cheeks to turn an unnatural shade of red. The boy and the girl on the sofa started to laugh, breaking the discomfort that was once present in the room.

"Err… Taichi, this is my brother, Takeru," Yamato quickly introduced as he dashed over to where we all were, "And this is his girlfriend, He…"

"…Hikari," The girl corrected before she stood up and politely bowed. I was immediately taken aback; this girl shared the same name as my dead little sister! Yamato looked slightly sympathetic when he saw the look on my face; he obviously knew what I was thinking about, but he chose not to say anything.

"Uh… Yeah, I'm Taichi Yagami," I introduced being quick to snap out of the trance I was in before running my fingers through my hair, "I'm an idiot, don't mind me."

They both laughed again while Yamato barely managed to strain a smile, he never liked it when I went into what was known as my 'jackass' mode (Which happened often). When he leant across and whispered in my ear that he wanted to have a _talk _with me in the kitchen I instantly knew that I was in for pure Yama abuse (And not the good kind either). I followed him apprehensively into the kitchen more than aware that he was going to lecture me for making such a dreadful entrance. Trust me to forget the day of their arrival.

"Chi, you _are _an idiot!" Yamato quietly hissed once he had slid the kitchen door shut and had walked into the middle of the room.

"Oh, let's not beat around the bush."

He released a frustrated groan before placing both palms of his hands flat down onto one of kitchen worktop surfaces. It was sometimes amusing to see him get stressed over something unimportant, but this wasn't one of those times.

"I haven't told Takeru about _us _yet!" Yamato growled through gritted teeth as he stared down at the worktop surface for a few moments. His voice quietened when he added, "I'm not even sure if I want to yet."

I tried to place an arm around his waist, but he instantly rejected it. It was frustrating for me whenever he pushed me away like that. I watched as he then spun around then quickly dug into his jeans pockets before he tugged a packet of smokes out. I frowned as I watched him place a cigarette between his cherry red lips; obviously I wasn't enough to comfort him anymore.

I had been replaced with the drugs that were ruining everything we had built together.

---------------------

Yamato's gig was on the Saturday after Takeru and Hikari's arrival. His band was actually quite popular in Odaiba, so every once in a while they would rent out a venue (usually Odaiba Park in the summer) and always made profit with the amount of tickets they sold. They were known as _The Teenage Wolves_, a pack of teenagers that fed off their passion for music.

Including Yamato there was four of them. James was the oldest, an English lad who had the tendency to get hyper on sugar and coffee, he was the bands wild drummer. Timmy, who was surprisingly not English despite his full name being Timothy Kent (his parents were just obsessed with the English culture or something), an easygoing guy, he played keyboard, piano and rhythm guitar. And finally there was Marco, the youngest at fifteen years old; he could be _very _sulky at times but he was amazing on both rhythm and bass guitar.

They were all 'backstage' in their 'dressing room' (Being some crappy cabin behind the worn out performance stage that's in the centre of the park), while I was at the front of the queue with Sora, Takeru and Hikari. I squinted as I stared over at the setting sun that was shining a warm shade of orange, before I gazed back at the crowd of people that were behind us in the queue. I'd never seen so many turn up to The Teenage Wolves' concerts before, there were even security guards and policemen this time.

"Great turnout!" An overzealous voice cheered, belonging to a tall brunette who had just managed to make his way to the front of the queue (Ah, the privileges of having front row tickets) with a few more familiar voices. Daisuke Motimiya, to put it bluntly, was a loud mouth with the confidence of a twenty stone guy at a body-slam contest (if they even existed). I'd met him at some football practice club a couple of years back and we instantly clicked despite our four-year age gap.

With him was Ken Ichijouji, a quiet fourteen-year-old kid that also played football and was rather good from what I had heard from Daisuke, and Miyako Inoue, a self-assured thirteen-year-old who always spoke her mind.

When we had reached the front of the queue we were joined by Jyou Kido, a seventeen year old, who worried too much I was certain he'd suffer a brain haemorrhage before the age of twenty, his best friend, Koushiro Izumi, a fifteen year old computer genius who was too smart for his own good, and Mimi Tachikawa, a fifteen year old who is living proof that a girl _can't _have too many shoes.

"Tai-kun, do you know what Yama-kun is singing?" Mimi asked as she hooked her arm around mine. I choked slightly as the waft of her perfume almost burnt the inside of my nose. Most of my friends were calling Yamato 'Yama' thanks to Sora.

"He wouldn't tell me, said he wanted it to be a surprise or something," I quickly replied, though it was only half the truth. Matt had refused to tell me when I had asked, and then he left for Odaiba Park without even giving me a hug. I gathered that he was still in a strop over my behaviour on the day of his brother's arrival, though something was telling me there was more too it.

I yawned as my hands clasped the railings in front of us that prevented anyone from easily climbing onto the stage, before a finger poked my arm.

"Tired at this time?" Sora playfully teased before sticking out her tongue to reveal the piercing she had done only a few months ago. Her mum had freaked when she found out about it, and she was grounded for a month.

"Tai and Matt shag like rabbits; it's no surprise really," Koushiro, who was standing to the left of me, cuttingly mentioned. I blushed as I quickly looked to make sure Hikari or Takeru won't nearby. Luckily Daisuke, Ken and Miyako (The trio) were keeping them amused with their constant bickering and ranting. I knew Yama would have killed me if they had found out about _us _in a manner such as that. I had warned Daisuke earlier, so he had probably already told Ken and Miyako. Sora had received threats from Matt, so I knew that she wouldn't say anything too revealing. I managed to remind Mimi, Jyou and Koushiro before the concert actually started.

The audience went wild as The Teenage Wolves energetically rushed onto the stage; Timmy had both his arms raised in the air, joining in with the cheering, where as James saluted the crowed, as he always did. It was clear as day that they all had been drinking offstage, though no one else seemed to notice.

I soon found my eyes locked onto Yama as he slung the strap of his metallic blue guitar over his shoulder. He was wearing black eyeliner, contrasting with his pale skin, which made him look amazingly hot. It was true, only real guys wear makeup and Matt was the evidence for that.

His gaze met with mine for a few moments, before his mouth curled into a small smirk as he winked directly at me. He then sharply tore his eyes away from me before he looked to the back of the crowd, then tapped his index finger against the microphone in front of him in the centre of the stage to test if it was working properly.

"Welcome everyone, thanks for coming," Yama breathed down the mike as he ran his fingers through his spiky blond hair, which was gelled up to enhance its overall spikiness, before he grinned and shouted, "Enjoy the show!"

Everyone in the crowed whooped loudly, while The Teenage Wolves readied themselves and waited for everyone to quiet down. Marco then started to strum his fingers against his bass guitar, and after two bars Matt started to slide his fingers up down the frets of his guitar as he fluently plucked the strings as James came in on top with his drumming, as did Timmy with his silver rhythm guitar which had random black swirls printed on the back of it.

Yamato then passionately closed his eyes as he started to sing the first verse. His voice poetically echoed through the speakers that surrounded us.

_Eyes are feeling heavy but they never seem to close  
The fan blades on the ceiling spin but the air is never cold  
And even though you're next to me I still feel so alone  
I just can't give you anything for you to call your own_

After one sudden strum of his guitar he reopened his eyes and stared directly at me as he sung the chorus.

_And I can feel you breathing  
And it's keeping me awake  
Can you feel it beating?  
My heart's sinking like a weight_

I could feel how heavily I was actually breathing as he continued to stare at me as he prepared himself for the second verse. It amazed me how he could gaze at me so seductively while concentrating on playing the right riffs on his guitar at the same time. I started to imagine that he was zealously kissing my neck from behind as he belted out the next verse.

_Something I've been keeping locked away behind my lips_  
_I can feel it breaking free with each and every kiss  
__I couldn't bear to hurt you but it's all so different now  
__Things that I was sure of they have filled me up with doubt_

Though they were only simple lyrics I was beginning to question more and more whether he was hiding something from me.

He sung a Jimmy Eat World song once that song had finished; the crowd cheered stridently as the familiar guitar rift for 'Pain' echoed across the venue. I felt my heart beat rapidly against my chest as Yama sung loudly down the microphone in his velvety soft voice.

_I don't feel the way I've ever felt, I know  
__Gonna_ _smile and not get worried  
__I try but it shows  
__Anyone can make what I have built  
__And better now, anyone can find the same white pills_

"It takes my pain away," I mouthed the chorus almost robotically, as if finally coming to some sort of realization. It was apparent, the drugs were his way of masking out some sort of pain he was experiencing, though what that pain was I was unaware of at the time. All I knew was that he was suffering in silence and obviously wasn't ready to tell anyone- including me. 

We were all invited back to Matt's apartment once the concert had finished. I walked back in silence as Yama occasionally squeezed my ass, while he babbled on to his band mates and a few other unfamiliar faces about how great speed was when you take it before having sex. I had been the test dummy for that of course; it had only heightened the pleasure for him.

Takeru and Hikari were becoming suspicious of the way Matt was acting, so I told them that he was a little bit drunk, though I personally knew that he had taken speed straight after his band's gig. His pupils were clearly dilated; sweat was dripping down his brow causing a few strands of his hair to stick together. The Yamato I once knew was starting to disappear before my very eyes and it was admittedly rather frightening.

"Aw shit, I can't find my key! Heh, always the way isn't it?" Matt announced once we had reached the apartment door, after he had dug around in his jean pockets for a few seconds. I sighed inwardly absolutely hating how strange Yama was acting, before reaching into my own pocket to pull out my set of keys.

"Yamato, I've got the stuff you asked for," An unfamiliar proclaimed quietly as I unlocked and opened the door. Immediately I turned around and laid my eyes upon Matt's drug dealer for the first time. He was a little older than us, I had actually seen him around and knew he lived in the same apartment block as us. He had short messy black hair, which was in that 'I've just got out of bed' style, and squinty dark brown beady eyes that screamed that he urgently needed glasses or contact lenses. I hated him instantly. He didn't like me either, I could tell from the moment he glared back at me with those corrupt eyes of his. He was nothing but pure trouble.

---------------------

I woke up the next day on my apartment's sofa, fully dressed with a blinding headache, barely remembering anything that had happened at Matt's apartment. I was convinced we had a vodka shot contest at some point, and I never backed out of such a challenge. As I sat up and buried my half my face into my hand, I recalled Yama sniffing poppers and smoking weed with a few other people as I carelessly competed in that idiotic shot competition.

I managed to rise to my feet, almost falling forwards as I underestimated my physical state. I gripped onto the edge of the sofa to balance myself upright before I eyed the kitchen doorway where my mum happened to be standing. She narrowed her eyes in suspicion as she inspected my hung-over state until she sighed in sympathy.

"You came in at three in the morning," My mum notified as she started to walk towards me before thrusting a glass of water and a packet of painkillers in my face; I immediately took them from her then slumped back down onto the sofa.

"Why didn't you stay over at Matt's?" She asked casually while I swallowed a couple of painkillers.

"Not enough space," I explained once placing my glass of water down onto the coffee table, "Takeru sleeps on the sofa and Yama gave his own bed up to Takeru's girlfriend."

"That can't be doing your sex life any justice," My mum said as she picked the painkiller packet up from the coffee table, causing me to blush slightly. I wasn't surprised that my mum knew that I was sleeping with Matt; we made a lot of noise during our lovemaking and were sure that the deaf old couple next door could hear us, but she spoke about it as if she had just informed me that dinner was ready.

"Well…" I trailed off as the phone started ringing, thankfully killing the awkward conversation my mum had managed to make. Still, another uneasy feeling appeared in my stomach as we both eyed the phone for a few seconds, as if it was a venomous snake ready to attack.

"I'll get it," My mum exclaimed, but I had already picked up the ringing object.

"Hello? Yagami residence."

"Taichi, it's Ray Yagami, your father. Please don't hang up!"

Him again? I readied myself to slam the phone back onto the holder, but I felt my entire body cease up as I briefly glanced over at my mum and saw that she chewing on her lower lip. It was apparent that my father had something to do with what my mum had been hiding from me for the past few months

I continued to listen to his voice managing to take in every word he was saying, instead of rejecting it as bullshit. Soon, my face paled before I moved the phone away from my ear as I uneasily turned my head to the side to look at my mum.

"My little sister's still alive, isn't she?"

My mum instantly broke our eye contact as she sharply spun around so that her back was now facing me. She took a deep breath in.

"Yes, she is…"

---------------------

_Song lyrics- _

**"Breathing"** by Yellowcard  
**"Pain" **by Jimmy Eat World

D-Angel: Oh yes, it's all so dramatic! And it's gonna get better! He he. Obviously not for Tai… Poor lil guy, and Yama… I'm mean to both of them.

Thanks for reading anyways! Please review (Constructive criticism is always welcome, flamers are never taken seriously)

Have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

See you next chapter! (Which may not be until February _-sobs-)_

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-D-Angel-

25/12/05 (Woots! Tis Christmas!)


	6. Chapter 6

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_ Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Whoosh! Here's another chapter, posted up in February like I promised ;) Thanks for all your reviews so far :) I am glad you guys like this story. Anyways, enough of me rambling on, here's Chapter 6, read on and enjoy…

**Rating:** **M**

**Warnings:** Major angst, some lime (guy x guy, naturally)… and… a few surprises :)

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Chapter 6

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For over half my life I thought that my younger sister had died from heart problems, so learning that she was still alive just made me feel sick. I could hardly bear to listen to my mum's reason for lying, once I had thanked my father for informing me that my sister was still alive. He didn't even know that I thought she was dead, my mum obviously hadn't told him.

"I couldn't cope with raising a sick child," My mum had sobbed through her tears while I had angrily slammed my fist down onto the dining table, "Especially after your father left… I couldn't cope."

I scoffed loudly.

"You didn't have to tell me that she was dead!" I shouted back as I started to tremble in fury, "That's just plain sick! I bet she didn't even have heart problems."

"She did Taichi…"

"…So why did you abandon her? Why did you put her up for adoption?"

I watched as her lips uneasily opened and closed while only strange sighing and faint murmurs escaped from her throat, before realizing that I had struck a nerve. She wasn't prepared to answer my questions, that or she didn't have any reasonable answers. I didn't stick around to wait anyway, I had already decided to get a shower before going for a walk somewhere to help ease my pounding head and the general sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

My mum said nothing as I walked out the apartment, which summed up for me how much she actually cared.

A thought soon occurred to me as I walked through Odaiba Park. Takeru's girlfriend shared the same first name as my sister, and she was roughly around the same age as her. There was a strong, yet coincidental possibility that she was _my _sister. However, I dismissed these thoughts when Takeru informed me that Hikari lived with her biological parents and that she definitely an only child. I didn't ask if she had heart problems since she appeared to be fine, and didn't take any medication that I knew of.

I later told myself that it wasn't very uncommon for a Japanese girl to be called 'Hikari', so I didn't enquire any further.

Still, after I had found out about my mum's lie I made sure to avoid her by spending most my time at Yamato's place, and only returning to my own apartment when _she _was at work.

A few days later, I made my way back to Matt's apartment after visiting Sora who wanted to know how I was. She knew about my mum lying and about my sister still being alive, yet I hadn't told Yamato. Well, he was high or drunk half the time I saw him, and also I was admittedly afraid that he would turn around and say "So what?"

I was surprised as I walked into Yamato's living room to have my boyfriend instantly rush up to me and throw his arms around my waist. He rested his head on my shoulder and held me close, and it was rather nice.

"I'm sorry, Chi," He soon whispered while brushing his fingers through my messy brown hair, then he kissed me on my lips gently. I wasn't too sure what he was apologizing for, but I decided to kiss him back anyway to show that I had forgiven him. He then moved his head back and grinned at me, in such a way that he instantly gave me a hard-on.

We kissed again shortly after that.

"I want you to know that you're very important to me," He breathed into my ear as we stumbled towards his bedroom. I felt slightly giddy when he said that, so I just laughed softly before telling him that he meant the world to me. He glided his hand across my cheek and smiled back before he pushed me onto the bed and instantly straddled me. His lips brushed against mine, and then he slid his tongue between my lips as his hands started to tug at my t-shirt. I stretched my body out and grinned lazily as he pulled my t-shirt over my head, before he threw it to the floor and started to plant random kisses around my neck and collarbone.

He pulled away and hurriedly tore off his own t-shirt in eagerness, while I sat up and ran my hands across his exposed chest; my index finger teasingly ran over his nipple piercing and his breathing grew louder.

A few minutes later I was pinning Yama down, kissing him with fiery as I stroked his arousal through the material of his flimsy jeans. He mewed softly, like a submissive kitten, which strangely made a refreshing change from him fighting for dominance over me.

He started to whimper and moan louder as I snuck my hands into his jeans and allowed one hand to rub his erection, while the other rested on his pert ass. He carefully grabbed the chain around my neck then pulled my head level to his, before he forced our lips together again.

I soon moved my head back to get some air before I looked into his maturing eyes and smiled.

"I want to be inside of _you_," I purred as I teased his lower entrance with one of my fingers.

Matt suddenly winced underneath me and went completely silent. I soon rolled off him then sat up so I could see his facial reaction.

"No, I'm not ready," He replied back quietly as he sat himself up.

"I'll be gentle, Yama," I said with a smirk as I ran my hand along his thigh.

"I said NO!" He suddenly snapped before he hopped off the bed and instantly buried his head in his hands. I was taken aback by his abrupt reaction, but I still managed to climb off the bed then wrap my arms around him. He tried hard to wiggle away from me, but I refused to let him go this time. I was lucky not to get a fist in my face.

"Don't Yama, just hug me."

He instantly stopped struggling and started to cry while I soothingly rubbed his back, trying my best to calm him down. Truth was, I was scared at that moment. It felt like _I _had done something wrong, despite I realised that there something more to the situation. Something Yamato was hiding.

"Nothing," Yamato grumbled when I asked him what was wrong, "I'm just not ready."

My arms went limp and he pushed away from me, before he slid back over to his bed and sat himself on the edge of it. One of my eyebrows rose as Matt gazed vacantly at the corner of the ceiling for a few seconds, then his eyes started to water again.

"Chi…"

I instantly joined him on the bed and placed an arm around him, before he flung his arms around me and burst out crying again. I'd _never _seen him like that before and so I didn't know exactly how to react, or what I could do to soothe him. I thought about questioning him again, but as he clenched onto me tighter and as his tears continued to soak my back, I realised that all he wanted to do was cry.

After that, we made love. He was on top, though we faced each other and spoke to each other quietly about moving away from Odaiba and getting an apartment of our own in Kyoto, or somewhere else. I was in such a state of ecstasy at the time that everything he said to me then sounded so feasible.

'_You wanna take a ride?_

As Yamato held me tightly while we slept, before Takeru and Hikari returned. I smiled and snuggled up to him as I temporarily woke up, before drifting reassuringly back into a peaceful sleep. It was times like those that I savoured, where Yama wasn't high on drugs and was just himself.

Warm, gentle, kind and loving- the Matt that was fighting to stay in control.

'_Get out of this place while we still have time'_

----------------

"Shit, Yama! When did it happen?" I asked down the phone, my hands were trembling as I tried to tug on my trainers. I was barely able to make out what Yamato was saying on his end of the phone, his voice was quivering and he was sobbing in distress.

Just hours before Matt had phoned me, with the news that Takeru was in hospital with serious head injuries, I had decided to reveal to Takeru that I was dating his older brother. We spent most the morning looking around town, before we decided to buy ice cream and head to Odaiba Park.

By the time we had reached an unoccupied bench, we had typically already finished our ice creams and I nervously slid my tongue against my teeth. Takeru was seemingly relaxed; he had just sent a text to Hikari informing her that he would meet her back at Yamato's apartment (I think at the time she was shopping with Mimi and Sora).

I was wondering how to tell Takeru that I was having a relationship with his brother, without freaking the poor kid out. In the end I just decided to be as blunt and clear as I could.

"I'm having a relationship with Yamato," I hesitantly explained as I nervously laced my fingers together. I was expecting a long silence, or at least some form of uneasiness. But Takeru replied back almost instantly.

"I know," He said casually before he smiled.

My eyes widened in shock.

"What?"

Had Yamato already told him? No, he was trying his best to make sure that Takeru wouldn't find out.

"Don't act so surprised," Takeru calmly explained, "It's rather apparent, you're too close to be _just _friends," the grin on his face widened before he added, "And I did catch you two kissing a couple of times."

I blushed, obviously Yama and I hadn't been _that _careful after all. The smile from Takeru's face soon disappeared and was replaced with a thoughtful and curious expression.

"I just can't understand why my brother won't tell me," Takeru then sighed as he ran his fingers through his blond hair, "He should already know that I will always respect the choices he makes, if they are what makes him truly happy."

There was maturity in those blue eyes of his; I could tell that for a twelve year old he'd been through a lot. He was strong though and had the willpower to not let his problems get him down. He was the complete opposite to Yamato.

I decided to head on home after I had spoken to Takeru, I knew that my mum would be at work still seeing as she always worked overtime during the summer, so I didn't have to listen to her constantly keep asking for my forgiveness. There was no way I would ever forgive her properly.

I never expected such shocking news when Yamato phoned me a few hours later on my mobile as I was about to watch a famous British film called 'Psycho'. And that's how I found myself rushing to the hospital to calm my boyfriend down.

"He… He ran across the road… Y…You know how it's never busy? That's why I wasn't… worried," Matt stuttered he then broke down into tears again. I gritted my teeth and decided to take a shortcut through Odaiba Park, to avoid crossing the road that Yamato was referring to.

"Before it happened… h...he said 'Why didn't you tell me that you were with Taichi?'" Matt then choked down the phone again, "He was only a few inches away from me… b…before the car… the car…" He started cry heavily again, then our phone call was suddenly cut off. I presumed that he had run out of credit or something, it didn't at all cross my mind that he had hung up the call himself.

When I finally arrived I saw Yamato standing by the hospital entrance. A cigarette was resting between his lips, though it wasn't even lit. He was starring blankly at the ground as I approached him. He soon glanced up when he heard my heavy panting, an empty look was apparent in his watering blue eyes.

"Takeru's dead, Tai."

---------------------

_Song lyrics_

**"Work"** by Jimmy Eat World

D-Angel: Apologies to Takeru fans :( It's all part of this story's plot, sadly. So now, things can only get worse for our lovely Taichi and Yamato.

I've already started working on the next chapter, though, as always; do not expect any regular updates from me right now. I have once again underestimated the stress of school and now I am paying the price -.-

Please review, then I might just survive through all the coursework and schoolwork I currently have >.>

Thanks for reading ;)

See you next chapter!

-D-Angel-

07/02/06


	7. Chapter 7

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_ Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: I apologize for my lack of updates, but schoolwork and exams did pretty much cripple me. However, now I am exam/school free until I go off to Uni in October (which I may not yet, depending on my exam results, and also if I decide to take a gap year), which means that I should have time for regular updates, so yey :)

Read on and enjoy…

**Rating:** **M**

**Warnings:** Angst, violence, strong language

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Chapter 7

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I was unable to sleep. My thoughts were plagued with concern for Yamato. He was drifting further and further away from me, and it was becoming impossible for me to chase after him. Too much had happened in such little time, and therefore neither of us knew how to rightly deal with them.

Takeru, dead? Those two words just didn't seem to fit together. I was unable to believe it at first, I mean, I had spoken to kid barely hours before. It just didn't seem right. There was no logic that could define it. I seriously thought Yamato was joking at first- I expected him to suddenly crack a smile and say, '_only kidding! Takeru's doing fine!'_

It would have been such a sick joke, and I probably would have had a fight with him over it, but at least it wouldn't have been the poison that was responsible for the breakdown of our relationship.

What actually happened after Takeru's death was absolutely fucking awful.

Yamato's father had taken time of work, though not to support Yamato, who had clearly been affected by the unexpected loss of his brother, but to organise Takeru's funeral and visit relatives. He had also insensitively given Yamato the task of choosing the songs for Takeru's funeral, not even noticing that his _living _son was on the verge of a breakdown.

The worse thing was that Yamato's mum blamed him, which, although Yama wasn't surprised by, it still hurt him that his mother disliked him that much. She couldn't stop him from going to Takeru's funeral though, since she didn't want to be viewed as a heartless mother who was bitter about the loss of her youngest son. Shame that she was blind to see that Yama was just as distraught as she was. In fact, in my opinion, he was finding it most difficult to cope with Takeru's death.

I let myself into Yamato's apartment two days after the accident, prepared to lend my support to my boyfriend and see him for the first time since that horrible night up the hospital.

Initiatively I was concerned when I walked into the living room to find that Yamato was standing a few paces from the doorway I was by, his back facing me so I was unable to see how much the past couple of days had affected his physical appearance. I cleared my throat, though I soon briefly wondered why I made such an obvious action when it was apparent that Yamato knew I was in the same room he was.

I took a step towards his still figure, feeling even more unnerved when I heard his faint irregular breathing, which suggested that he was about to break down into a fit of tears at any moment.

"Yamato?"

He remained silent, so I took another step towards him and placed a hand on his shoulder. Yamato then instantly spun around, and one of his fists smashed heavily against my right eye socket.

"It's your fucking fault!" Matt screamed, laying into me with a frenzy of punches and slaps, the crazed expression on his face was all I could focus on while I shielded myself as best as I could from his blows, though they soon became sluggish as his eyes started to water. I almost fell completely backwards as Matt then abruptly pushed me away with a disgusted expression on his face, as he backed up against the wall behind the sofa.

"Fuck off! Get the fuck out of my life!" He spat before sliding down the wall as he collapsed onto the floor in tears, with his body trembling in such an inhuman and surreal manner. I definitely didn't want to leave him in such a state, so I made my way over to where he was slumped. Matt instantly stared up at me when he became aware that I was still there, and I felt a shiver run down my back as I saw a cold shine of accusation in his ice blue eyes.

"G…Get out!"

So much anger.

I was in such a daze as I made my way towards the front door. It took me almost five minutes to pull on my trainers, and another two minutes to sum up the courage to leave Yamato by himself. I kept telling myself that it was for the best and that he needed a little more time to himself to come to terms with Takeru's death.

But then, who was I fooling? Yamato would never completely get over the loss of his baby brother. Not in a million years. Which is why he chose to blame me, and honestly, I could see why. I had been with Takeru only hours before the accident, and most significantly, I had told him about my relationship with Yamato. So effectively, I was responsible for the chain reaction of events that had occurred afterwards. That was the only reason that I could think of that fit with explanation as to why Yamato had attacked me back in his apartment.

I tried so hard to deny that the bond between us wasn't fading, but it was inevitable that our relationship was taking a turn for the worse. There were things that I hadn't told Yamato, which, especially after he'd been so aggressive and violent towards me, I couldn't even bring myself to tell him.

My sister was still alive, whereas his brother had just died. That was the simple reality.

I had heard that life could be ironic from time to time, but that was just a fucking outright case of mockery.

The pain from the beating I took from Yamato surprisingly did not even affect me until I had reached the ground floor of the apartment block complex. It was then that my knees suddenly gave way, similar to the time when someone had kicked me in hamstrings during a football match, after a tackle had gone wrong. I fell heavily to my knees onto the ground, in what felt like slow motion, stretching both arms out in front of me instinctively to break my fall. A few layers of skin on the palms of my hands peeled away when they made contact with the sharp gravel, and I winced as a stinging sensation irritated the small grazes that had just been created.

My vision was strangely hazy, and I noticed that my right eye was squinted; in fact, it almost completely shut, against my will. I raised one hand up to my eye, only to quickly move it back when it had briefly brushed against my eyelid. The pain was sharp and abrupt, and from that I knew that Yamato had given me a lovely black eye. My jaw ached too, and my right cheekbone.

I must have looked such a state, half-slumped by the bottom of the stairwell with evident red and purple coloured marks across my face, yet I hardly cared about my own well-being. Yamato was all I could think about, images of his confused angry face as he screamed at me to _get the fuck _out of his life, which was something that I would stubbornly refuse to do at a time like this.

----------------

I never expected Yama to text me a couple of days later, asking me to come round to his apartment. I couldn't think of any reason why he wanted to see me, other then wanting to apologize for hitting me.

As I stepped into his apartment I did feel slightly apprehensive, irrationally worried that Yama would jump out from behind the sofa with a chisel, or a sledgehammer, in his hands. However, there was just a heavy silence and no Yamato in sight. I slid across the floor meekly, towards my boyfriend's bedroom, until I heard the clicking sound of a lock, followed by the quiet creaking of hinges.

Yama came padding out of the bathroom dressed in his favourite pair of blue denim jeans that were close to falling from his skinny hips, and a black 'System of a Down' t-shirt which also looked baggy on his thinning frame. Strands of his blond hair were stuck to his forehead, giving the impression that he had just hopped out of the shower.

His blue eyes were seemingly empty, although I could trace the smallest imprint of emotion that disrupted the faux sheet of glass that tried to conceal his inner feelings.

"Fuck," he choked quietly under his breath when he saw the marks on my face. I watched his lips tremble as he tried to say something else.

"They're fine," I quickly lied, then broke eye contact with him. He didn't have to say sorry for physically hurting me since I knew he did not mean to. He already had enough on his plate as it was, so the last thing I wanted was for him to worry about me.

Yamato looked as if he was about to protest, but then he sighed quietly under his breath and then sluggishly trudged over to the sofa and sat down without saying another word. I joined Yamato, finding myself having to stop my arm from sliding round his waist. He shifted uncomfortably and bit down on his lower lip as he ran his hand briefly through his damp hair. Matt had always been pale in complexion, but I was unable to deny how ghostlike his appearance had become, especially since he had started taking drugs, and most definitely after the death of Takeru.

"I have… things to tell you," Matt thoughtfully began; he then wiped his brow with the back of his hand as he took a deep breath inwards. His face broke into a false small smile, before it was quickly replaced with an apparent expression of distress. I laced my fingers together and tried to prepare myself for what he was about to tell me, though the atmosphere had become strangely unnerving. My brain started to search for a list of things that he would possibly want to tell me, but seemed incapable of even compiling one logical suggestion.

I…" he then shook his head. His eyes started to water, but he was quick the wipe the forming tears away with the side of his hand. I desperately wanted to comfort him despite something was preventing me from moving at all. It was if I had suddenly become paralysed from the neck down, so all I could do was hopelessly listen.

He breathed in sharply, then out again, before he told me.

"When I was fourteen my uncle…" he swallowed loudly as he gripped his forehead with his hand, "he raped me at my grandmother's funeral."

It's difficult to describe what it felt like to hear those words escape from Yama's lips. It was definitely worse than a slap round the face, and perhaps similar to having heavy object smash against your face, giving you no time whatsoever to defend yourself from the pain and, of course, the shock.

It was just very unexpected. Yamato had bottled it up inside of himself so well over the past two years. I knew something had been bothering him, especially after his grandmother's funeral, but I had always put it down to him being unable to see Takeru as often as he had wanted to. I would have never thought for one second that Yama had been raped. It was such a sickening thought.

Despite all those thoughts running through my mind, it was funny how all I could say was "Shit, Yama…"

Yamato half-shrugged, suddenly acting as if he had only told me that he'd been giving a detention for misbehaving in class. I loathed his fickle mood-changing characteristic more than I wanted to murder his drug dealer…

"I never liked him, my uncle. He always had a creepy vibe about him that just made me feel uncomfortable." Yamato wrinkled his nose in disgust while he vacantly glanced over my shoulder. Then, unexpectedly, he stared me straight in the eyes.

"I hardly expected him to rape me in the end."

He broke eye contact and ran his tongue briefly across his lips as he gazed down at the floor.

"Only thought he was the sort that would be satisfied with just a grope here and there." he paused, and then he smiled sarcastically now seeming to be in a thoughtful state before he ominously added, "They never are though, are they?"

Yama half-smiled again, though he was clearly fighting a frown.

"I was actually thankful that my uncle had turned his attention on me, rather than my brother," Matt's face then changed to an expression of bitterness, "But then…" He stood up; almost lacking the strength to support his body mass as he clumsily stumbled. Regaining his footing quickly, Yama walked over to the table and picked up one of the four cigarettes that were spread across its surface. He then grabbed the single lighter on the edge of the table, before sitting back down on the sofa next to me.

"But then, Takeru told me that 'Uncle Ren had touched him in his special place'… He was only fucking ten at the time!" The blue flames in Matt's eyes suddenly flared up dangerously while he grit his teeth together hard. "What was worse that it had been going on since he was eight! My mum was letting a fucking paedophile into her house, and was ironically endangering the one she _tried _to protect!"

He lit his cigarette. A thick silence started to crawl between us, but I soon shattered that.

"Why… Why didn't you tell me! Yama?" My voice dramatically increased in pitch when I said his name and he instantly removed his cigarette from between his half-shut mouth.

"I just did."

There was something about his sudden frosty behaviour that agitated and worried me further.

"No! I mean, why did you keep it hidden from me? For so long." I whispered the last three words when I felt tears well up in the corners of my eyes. "That bastard… he…"

"…Why did I keep it hidden from you?" Yamato laughed dryly after taking another drag of his cigarette. Two separate tears then slowly slid down my cheeks, annoying me since it just felt as if they were lingering there deliberately to upset me further. Yamato's derisive smile instantly vanished when he turned his head to the side and finally noticed that I was crying.

"Chi," his tone of voice had softened, like the times he spoke to me when we were being intimate, "I couldn't burden you with my problems, when, actually, just spending time with you made me feel fucking great," he solemnly explained, before placing a trembling hand on my cheek.

"I didn't want you to worry. I never wanted to tell you. I tried to hide it, but…but it was eating me up inside… and… and…" He never finished his sentence. His emotions got the better of him, and they fell hopelessly from his eyes that were quivering with vulnerability, like a young child. My arms flung around him and he automatically wrapped his arms tightly around my waist.

"I'll be seeing him again at Takeru's funeral… I'm so scared, Tai."

I didn't want to see the bastard who had hurt Yamato. I knew that I would find it difficult not to fatally castrate him. But, I didn't want him laying his filthy hands on Yama anymore.

"Shh, it's ok, I'm here for you whenever you need me," I reassuringly whispered as he rested his chin on my shoulder, and as my fingers brushed through his damp knotted blond hair, I felt the need to hold onto him forever.

"I'll protect you."

---------------------

D-Angel: Gah, it's becoming depressing to write this story now! But I am determined to finish it! Raaar! Just bear with me for a few more chapters, heh. As always, I have started on the next chapter, and I'm guessing it will be posted up a little while after my birthday (Which is tomorrow, and I will be 18 years of age… O.o So old!). Remember that I have a life too, but no school, so I can't use schoolwork as an excuse for my slow updates! (Bleh!). Thanks for reading anyways, and erm, please review.

I shall see you next chapter!

-D-Angel-

28/07/06


	8. Chapter 8

_**Nothing is Forever**_

_Summary:_ Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Hey people. Another chapter for your viewing pleasure hope you like it. The Creative Writing side of the degree I am currently doing has been useful and interesting, and I'm hoping it will benefit towards what I write in my free time (such as this story, and my others of course). This story only has a few more chapters to go now, which I'm not sure whether it is a good thing or a bad thing, lol. Hope you guys enjoy.

**Rating:** **M**

**Warnings:** Strong language, sexual implications, drug usage

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Chapter 8

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The funeral, Takeru's funeral, was awfully uncomfortable. Yamato was stoned by the time we got there. Until that point I wasn't sure if Matt's dad knew he took drugs, and I learnt from the expression of disapproval on his face in the car that he was aware that Matt was smoking hash, though it was clear that he wasn't even going to lightly slap his arm and tell him off.

I tilted my head back onto the uncomfortable car seat's headrest, ignoring the herbal fumes that had seeped over to where I sitting, and closed my eyes.

I had visited Sora the day before the funeral. A few days before I had received a phone call from my dad who nervously asked me if I wanted to stay with him for a few days. I wasn't sure what decision to make, and Sora was the only person I could turn to for advice at the time. She had one of her boyfriend's round when I knocked for her, he answered the door and I assumed that her mum was out (she was really strict about Sora having boyfriends round).

"Who are you?" He asked gruffly as his eyebrows slowly fell inwards.

"Well, I'm…"

"My gay friend I was telling you about," Sora sighed, as she joined him at the doorway dressed in an oversized dark green hoody and a pair of frayed knee cut jeans. Her hair was lazily tied back into a ponytail and there were small black bags underneath her eyes. I ignored the fact that she had rudely informed her latest man that I was a fag and spontaneously stepped into the flat, pushing past the both of them without saying another word.

It didn't take too long for her boyfriend to leave, and I was sprawled across Sora's bed explaining my dilemma to her. She sat on a chair by her desk, cross legged, carefully absorbing in every word I was saying, despite most of it sounding pathetic in my opinion.

"Sounds like he really wants to make amends," Sora said as she uncrossed her legs and leant towards me, "Are you ready to see him?"

I sat up the combed my hair away from my eyes with my fingers.

"I'm not sure, especially with what has, and is, happening."

Sora shifted in her chair again and analysed me with her serious eyes and said the best damn thing anyone could have advised in relation to the situation I was in.

"I think you need to do what's best for you- not Yama. You love him more than anything, I know." She took a deep breath. "But only _he _can sort out the worst of his problems, and if you try and help him with those then he will only end up dragging you down."

I sat in stunned silence for a bit, rationally thinking about what she had just said.

"Stand by and support him, but don't let his problems become your own. It's a difficult thing to do- I should know- but, you have your own worries too, and only you can solve them."

"_I couldn't burden you with my problems… I didn't want you to worry."_

Yamato had not wanted me to become plagued with his problems as well, but Sora was right; it was challenging not to become obsessed and involved with harmful issues that were hurting someone you loved. It was easy to forget about the ones that were hurting _me_.

"Chi... Are you going to Takeru's funeral?"

The discomfort in her voice made me wince a little, but I ended up answering her question the moment her jaw came to rest.

"Someone has to keep Yamato company."

I didn't mean that as a dig, though it did sound slightly spiteful since I was fully aware that Sora was unable to attend the funeral. However, I also saw it as my way of supporting Yamato- he had asked me to go, and I wanted to see the asshole that was responsible for harming him. Sora knew nothing about the rape, it wasn't my place to go around telling people, even my friends- it was entirely Yamato's choice who he wanted to tell and when.

It was hardly a shock that we were late for the funeral. By that time the effects of Yamato's joint had worn out, and he was aggressively growling at his dad, saying that if he had not stopped at the service station halfway through the journey we would have made it here on time. He had been too stoned off his face to realize that at the time he had been the one that had demanded to stop there complaining that he needed to 'use the bathroom' (he ended up throwing up in a shrub next to where the car was parked).  
I put my arm supportively around Yamato as we walked into the small building where the service was taking place, before the burial. A few heads turned and a cosmopolitan collection of expressions stung our eyes. We were quick to sit down on one of the empty pews at the back of the room as the priest made his speech. Then, we had to endure Yamato's mum cry down the microphone because she was too distressed to even deliver a single word.

After a few relatives, Takeru's girlfriend, Hikari, recited a poem that she had specially written for him. I didn't see her again at the funeral after she returned back to her seat (apparently she left before the actual burial).

Eventually, Yamato stood up and walked sluggishly up to the small podium to deliver his speech. He knew that talking about his brother in front of a room full of relatives and family friends was something that his mother couldn't prevent him from doing (though she had prevented Yamato's dad from saying a thing, in exchange for letting him even come to the funeral).

Like he always did at his gigs, Yamato lightly tapped his finger against the small microphone when he had reached the podium, before he took a delicate breath in.

_Tama ni namida ga dechau  
Sou kuyashii kara  
Bokura no waarudo hitori ja nai  
Demo akogare datte chanto motteru  
Suashi no mama de ireba kitto be all right_

_Kanransha choujou tsuitara  
Sora made chikai yo  
Onaji sora takusan no hito wo  
Mamotte iru ne_

_Ashita mo kyou ga tsuzuku no?  
Negaeba kitto tsuzuku yo ne_

_Ashita tenki ni naare yume made todoke  
Teruteru bouzu to nakayoku narou  
Hora akushu wo sureba ishindenshin  
Kimi mo egao wo misete  
Zutto be all right..._

An almost heavenly essence had smothered the room. Not one person there had ever heard Yamato sing with such passion and reason before, including me.

Later, I found out that it was a song that Takeru had written for him after the death of their grandmother.

----------------

After the burial, I found myself keeping my eyes wide open to try and spot Yamato's uncle; despite I did not even know what he looked like. It was funny how I never made the link between the reasons why Yamato had refused to let me be on top during sex, and obviously his pervert of an uncle. Now knowing, it was screamingly evident and I swore that I would kill the bastard for scarring the person who I loved more than anything.

"That's him," Yamato uneasily whispered after nudging me with his sharp and bony elbow, my eyes instantly sliding in the direction he was staring. I felt a foam of hatred and anger bubble up in my stomach when I soon enough saw the inhuman beast.

Admittedly, his appearance didn't evidently reveal that he was pervert, unless, like me, you happened to already know that he was. He wore a crinkled white shirt with a faded black tie, well-fitted black trousers, but scruffy black shoes. His hair was a dirty shade of blond, though there wasn't much left of it.

Despite Yamato was no longer looking over in the man's direction, I knew it was him, I knew that he was the one that had help towards damaging my fragile lover. God I wanted to kill him (it seemed highly convenient being in a graveyard and all).

Yamato tensed up, in what I could tell was fear, as the man made his way over to us. I instinctively took a step forward and half stood in front of Yama, but then I had to step back when a hoarse, deep voice announced Yama's name.

His uncle was obviously a little surprised with how much his nephew had changed over the past two years. Yamato must have only been 5ft 6 or 7, which seemed like dwarfism compared to his extraordinary height of 6ft exact at that current moment in time. He easily towered over his uncle, though his lack of confidence destroyed whatever advantage he could have had over him.

"Skinny little runt you've become," His uncle mocked as he scouted Yama up and down with his narrow sunken eyes, then he turned his attention to me, seemingly amused with the rage that was present on my face. I was desperate to say something explicitly offensive and even more tempted to beat him up beyond recognition. However, he glanced back over at my boyfriend and sarcastically smiled as if to say 'think he can protect you?' I drew my fist back ready to strike, but Yama clamped onto my wrist tightly, too aware of what I really wanted to do.

I regret letting his uncle walk away unharmed, but I soon realized that punching someone at a funeral was highly inappropriate and that also Yamato was not ready to reveal that his uncle was a paedophile.

----------------

A middle aged woman approached us when Yamato knelt by the freshly covered grave to pay his final respects to Takeru. Her eyes were red and swollen, her hair was messy and straw-like and she was slowly shaking her head from side to side, like an everlasting swinging pendulum.

"My poor Takeru," She choked under her breath as Yamato rose to his feet and turned around to face her.

For one crazy moment I thought that they were going to hug, but all they did was stare at each other in clear discomfort. When I saw a unusual glimmer in Yamato's eyes I knew that he was about to confess something to her. .

"I'm gay," Yama clearly stated, putting most his emphasis on the last word.

His mum's lips parted in surprise as a small gasp escaped from the back of her throat.

"What?"

"This is Taichi Yagami, my boyfriend." Yamato pulled me close to his side as his arm hooked itself round my waist. I wasn't exactly sure what to do, or how to react! His mum was staring at us in such disgust; there was no way in the world that she was going to be as relaxed about the whole idea as my mum had been.

"I allowed Takeru to be around you," Miss Takishi dramatically whispered before cupping her hand over her mouth, "while you were doing _things _with another male." With the way she had reacted, Yamato just may have well told her that he just often fucked me and worshiped my cock like a god. It irritated me that some people could just not accept that two people of the same sex sometimes fall in love.

I stared directly at Yamato's mum and as I felt anger tear through me.

"Jesus, what the fuck is wrong with your family!" I loudly stated- releasing something which I had strictly ordered to keep locked away in my mind by using my mouth as a medium. One less thing to regret, my thoughts sadistically trilled. "How do you ever expect Yamato to feel good about himself when…"

A heavy lashing sound, followed by a sharp sensation pain stopped me from saying anything else. An uneasy silence replaced the atmosphere, as Miss Takishi hand remained suspended in midair for a few moments.

"You have… no right to say such things!"

Perhaps I didn't, but it actually felt damn good to say them. It was time that she faced reality and saw that her son was not happy.

"Free speech," I sneered, ignoring my aching cheek while resisting the urge to add 'bitch' onto the end of my sentence. Her arm dropped heavily back by her side before she lowered her head as she shook in a fiery rage of emotion.

"Tai."

"Yama, she has to…"

"Keep out of this Tai, it doesn't concern you," Yamato sternly said. He moved his arm away from me then turned towards Takeru's gravestone. A single tear fell from one of his quivering blue eyes, falling silently before it splashed against the framed photograph of Takeru that rested at the foot of the grave which he was longingly gazing at.

It was difficult for him to turn around and walk away from Takeru's grave, but it must have taken a stupid amount of courage to support place a hand on his mother's shoulder to say that he was sorry. I don't think it really mattered what for.

He just happened to know what words she loved hearing him say- words that shifted the blame away from her and onto him. She was that sort of person, and through knowing that I could see why Yamato pitied her.

----------------

Things grew worse after the funeral. Matt was becoming even more withdrawn. He never bothered coming round to see me, and he rarely phoned or text me to see how I was.

Our relationship was simply on the verge of a quick descent.

What the fuck could I do though? I had my own problems and stresses. My dad wanted me to visit him for the first time in twelve or so years, and I had decided to take him up on his offer, though I still couldn't ignore how fast everything was changing between me and Yamato. Sex was becoming empty and meaningless; things between us were crumbling at an apparent rate.

"Do you still love me, Yama?" I asked only to be met by an icy cold silence that made me grip the bed covers tighter. His back was faced to me as he sat up and perched himself on the edge of his bed.

"I don't know," was what he simply replied, before he climbed off the bed and walked out the room. I felt sick. I still loved him, despite I hardly knew the person he'd turned into. I guess I was hoping in vain that the old Yamato would suddenly return, but my gut instinct told me that that wasn't going to happen. His drug dealer, Junzo, had started to make regular visits to Yamato's flat, and they often got high together, even while I was there watching them laughing and practically flirting with one another. I told myself that they weren't acting more than friendly towards one another, but not even I could absorb myself into such a self-illusion of fantasy.

Another thing that pissed me off was that his father was turning a complete blind eye to the whole thing. He was often making trips over to Kyoto to see how relatives were coping with the death of Takeru. I had always viewed running away as an option for the weak, not to mention the cowardly.

On top of everything, my appetite dramatically decreased, and my sleeping pattern was completely screwed up. My mum had already started to notice the change in me- though I was focusing far much more on Yamato to realize that I was no longer acting like the immature hyperactive sixteen year old boy I had once been. I _was _still ashamed that she had lied to me, but my life was already too complicated, and I needed all the support I could get.

There was no point of even saying that things could not get any worse, because it was apparent that they would. As I walked into Yamato's bedroom one day, I was greeted by a disturbing sight. He was sitting on his bed, shirtless, hair dishevelled, with a black strip of material tied tightly around his arm. My eyes were then drawn to the needle that was held in his other hand, as he pushed a small jet of fluid out from its sharp point, still oblivious that I had even entered the room (then again, he may have been aware).

I felt dazed as I watched Yamato pierce his skin with the needle, before he injected every ounce of the substance into his bloodstream through a vein in his arm. The needle then dropped out of his hand as he leant against the pillows on his bed, shut his eyes, and sighed out in bliss. I immediately rushed over to him when he didn't move after that.

"What the fuck was that?" I demanded to know as I brushed a hand across his sweaty brow. Then, I regained the sense to untie the material from around his arm.

"Heroin," He whispered in a dreamy voice. I instantly froze. A horrible aching feeling started to niggle deep in the pit my stomach as I continued to stare into his clouded blue eyes. I had heard so many things about that drug, none saying that it was any good for your health.

One of my hands then automatically clamped onto his arm.

"Why?! You're harming yourself, Yama!" I cried, my eyes were stinging with my own tears as he looked up at me with his empty dilated eyes, before I collapsed onto his chest and started to sob, "You could die."

"I'm dead inside, what difference does it make?" He replied back chillingly, with not a trace of care apparent in his fading voice. The feeling in my chest turned into a dull, painful, thudding sensation.

"You're so much better than these drugs," I protested. But, he couldn't hear me. The substance he had injected into himself had reached its strongest stage of what may have been bliss for him, but was only torture for me.

There was nothing I could do.

Drugs were simply his escapism.

---------------------

D-Angel:  Well, there you go. Another chapter added to the book (metaphorically speaking). Took me at least two weeks to find a suitable funeral song, and I don't think I could have found anything more suitable then 'Be All Right' by Konishi Hiroko, which is interestingly Takeru's theme in the Japanese version of Digimon. Go on Animelyrics (dot) com to look up the English translations (I'd strongly recommend doing so if your Japanese is as bad as mine, heh). As always, reviews make me very happy, so please donate them, heh. Thanks for reading!

See ya next chapter!

* * *

-D-Angel- 

11/01/07

(My first 2007 update, lol).


	9. Chapter 9

_**Nothing is Forever**_

_Summary: _Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Hey everyone, I'm sorry it's taken this long for me to update. I've had a lot of crazy stuff happen to me over the past couple of months, and I've had a lot of University work to do (it's far more demanding than school!), but you may be pleased to know that pretty much all my work is out the way and I have no exams (get in!), so I have 3 weeks of nothing before the semester ends... Which means loads of time for me to write since after that I won't be back to University until the end of September (yey!). So yeh, here's chapter 9!

Rating: **M**

Warnings: Strong language, homosexuality, drug use, violence

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Chapter 9

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I found out when I got back from my dad's. It was a week before the new school term, and I was more restless than I had been the previous few weeks, thanks to the pile of homework I had completely forgotten about. My mum had left a note on the fridge informing me that she would not be returning home until late because she was once again working overtime. I felt lonely being in the flat by myself after spending a whole week with my father, so I instinctively found myself reaching for the phone.

First I rang Yamato's home phone, and after getting no response I assumed he was out, so I tried his mobile.

"Welcome to the voicemail service," An annoying automated voice droned into my ear. I hung up and sighed. He was probably too stoned, or whatever, to realize that his phone had run out of battery. I remained sprawled out across the sofa for a few more minutes before I decided to go and check up on him.

I casually let myself into the apartment, yawning briefly as I kicked off my trainers. I called out Yamato's name as I made my way towards the door. I stopped moving for a few seconds when I faintly heard music blaring from Yama's bedroom stereo.

**_'_**_You're no good for me_

_ I don't need nobody_

_ Don't need no one _

_ That's no good for me_**_'_**

I recognized the song, but couldn't quite remember the artist. I decided to ask Yama to refresh my memory as I opened the living room door and stepped into the room.

I instantly gagged as my eyes widened in horror.

Junzo and Yamato were both naked on the sofa. Their bodies were grinding together; sighs of pleasure were escaping from both of their lips.

**_'_**_You're no good for me_

_ I don't need nobody_**_'_**

The lyrics pounded heavily against my skull, growing louder as they synchronised with the moans and grunts spiralling around me. I quickly spun around and ran out the apartment after awkwardly stepping into my trainers. I dashed down the apartment complex's stone steps, almost slipping over as I reached the second to last step on a spilt beverage. After that I just ran. Hell knows how long I ran for; my legs just kept on going as if I was racing towards the finish line of a marathon, though I in fact had no real destination in mind. I just wanted to escape.

I stopped running when I reached a street I recognised- Koushiro lived in one of the apartments right near the end of the short avenue. I hadn't seen him in a while, in fact not since Yamato's last concert. I hadn't seen many of my friends since that day in fact- I'd been too busy keeping an eye on Yamato, though now I realised that what he did was way beyond my control.

I continued walking, once again not knowing where my feet were carrying me. All I knew is that I was desperate for a fag- the recent events had resulted in me turning to feeding my body with nicotine once again. It was fortunate I had a half-empty pack with me, though my mind was so scrambled with the images from earlier that I could barely walk straight let alone remember the contents of my pockets.

The realization soon sunk in- my boyfriend had been fucking his drug dealer. My legs suddenly turned to jelly as I sobbed out loud, unable to even hold the cigarette in my hand as I slumped against a nearby lamppost. Tears dribbled continuously down my face as I continued to howl out in emotional agony, I wanted to die. How could he hurt me in such a way?

I stayed there for quite some time before a guy walking his dog asked me if I was ok. I yelled something sarcastic before I dashed off, until I somehow found myself standing outside Sora's apartment with my hand hovering close to the door buzzer.

I suddenly turned away sharply. I had always run to Sora in times of need, but what I had just witnessed was still fresh in my mind. I wasn't ready to talk about it to anyone right then. So I walked around Odaiba Park for what seemed like hours, smoking every last cigarette I had on me as I feebly tried to hold back my tears. Once I had thrown the final cigarette butt onto the ground I decided to return to my apartment and sleep forever.

Five or so minutes later, my heart instantly missed a beat when I was only a few metres away from the apartment door. I had not expected to confront Matt only hours after seeing him destroy the remainder of what was left of our relationship. He was there, just leaning against the wall with a cigarette between his lips. When I got a little bit closer I soon realised it was a joint that was near enough finished. He removed it from his mouth when he noticed me and threw the poison to the ground before half-smiling at me.

I was not sure what to do when Matt suddenly stepped in front of me before mentioning, in a husky voice, how sexy I was looking. I stood there limply as he decided to take another small step forward and place his hands firmly on my hips, pressing his body close to mine as he ignored the furious expression on my face.

"I want you," his breath awkwardly tickled my neck while his hands tried to ease their way into my jeans. He was drunk, and completely off his head.

I pushed him hard away from me and swore loudly while he stared at me in what seemed like bemusement with his dilated bloodshot eyes. He tried to pin me up against the wall again, but once again I shoved him back.

"Get away from me," I hissed, feeling a fragment of guilt stab through me as a pained expression clouded over his eyes. He took a small step back, almost falling over, before he helplessly gazed at me. I wasn't sure if he knew what I had seen, or whether he was just too confused, drunk, and drugged up to acknowledge anything- at that moment, I didn't actually care, I just wanted him away from me until my head stopped aching.

"Chi, come on," Matt half-slurred as he tried to grab my arm, "My apartment's empty, we can fuck all you want." I frowned and slapped his hand away from me.

"Go fuck your drug dealer," I loudly snapped. Instantly our eyes widened in surprise at the words that had just escaped from my lips. Yamato looked shell-shocked; obviously he had not seen me enter his apartment earlier on to witness the sordid act. Silent tears started to form in the corner of his eyes, while I abruptly moved away from the wall and turned my back on him.

"Don't go," he pleaded, yet he made no effort to try and grab me as I started to walk towards my apartment door. I turned around and sternly told him to leave me alone, only not so politely.

"Tai, it wasn't anything serious," Matt whined as he moved even closer to me, this time trying to prevent me from unlocking the door with my key. I groaned in frustration wondering if I should just go and spend the night round a nearby friend's place, until Yamato snaked his arms around my waist.

"Don't leave me," he pathetically cried. The volume of his voice almost deafened me.

"Get the hell away!" I retorted as I tore him off me with all my strength, resulting in him staggering back and falling clumsily onto the concrete walkway. It was then that he started to cry loudly, his body was shaking uncontrollably. I could not help but pity him for a few moments, before I reminded myself that he had completely betrayed me.

I jumped when Yamato's bony hand suddenly clutched itself around my ankle. I had been too involved with my thoughts to notice that he had stopped sobbing out loud. The expression on his face was none like I had ever seen before, a sinister hungry glimmer was apparent in his reddened eyes. I was instantly scared.

He managed to rise to his feet by clawing his way up my body, like a crazed monster from a horror movie before he roughly slammed me up against the door and forced our lips together. I refused to kiss him back, but somehow I could not escape from his astringent embrace despite I was desperately trying to. His mouth tasted vile- a mixture of drugs, booze and fags- I was close to vomiting.

Matt stopped kissing me when he finally noticed that I wasn't responding. I turned away and went to unlock my door after pushing him away again. That was when I felt a blinding pain strike across the back of my skull, almost causing me to slump down onto my knees. I turned around instinctively and saw Matt angrily staring at me with a broken brick slab clutched in his right hand that was raised up high in the air, ready to strike me again.

"What the fuck? You think trying to knock me out with a brick will do you any good?" I yelled, then I swung my fist forwards and hit him across the side of his face when he went to hit me with the brick for a second time. Matt barely flinched though his head lolled to the side for a few moments before he looked at me furiously, his eyes were now glazed over completely and I barely recognised him as he lunged at me.

"Stop it! Go home, Yama!" I ordered as I grabbed his wrist tightly, feeling slightly safer when the brick fell to the ground. I can't remember how, but moments later I had pinned Yamato against the concrete floor, I think because he had tried to hit me again. He started screaming obscenities while I had to defend myself from his flailing limbs.

I was fortunate that my mum had heard the commotion coming from outside the flat and came rushing out to investigate what was going on.

"What the hell is…" my mum began, but her voice soon trailed off when she saw the sight in front of her. She instantly ordered for me to bring Yamato into our apartment, and I decided not to argue with her (she looked like she was ready to kill).

My mum continued to boss me around and made me put Yama on the sofa before I had to fetch him a glass of water while ignoring the stinging sensation in the back of my head. Yamato sniffed the clear liquid I had handed him before he dropped the glass onto the floor, rejecting what I had given him because it wasn't alcoholic.

"What has he taken?" My mum questioned, and I sluggishly shrugged my shoulders. She swore loudly as she grabbed the phone and quickly punched in a number.

"I think he's been smoking pot, but I'm not sure what else he's taken," I mentioned before she started to talk to Yama's dad on the phone.

"Your son is on my sofa completely drugged up."

I watched as she frowned before pulling a sarcastic expression.

"Yes I guess that's a good idea, I'm not responsible for looking after your son." She hung up and turned around to see me handing Yamato another glass of water.

"Tai! You're bleeding!" She gasped before she dashed into the kitchen, returning with a dishcloth soaked in cold water. I was rather confused, until I remembered the brick that Matt had hit me with and the aching feeling that was cascading through the back of my skull.

"Oh, it's ok, I'm…" I had reached round with the back of my head, only expecting to a few drops of blood to be against my fingertips when I had pulled my hand back, so it was only natural that I felt panicked when I saw that my entire hand was coated in bright red blood. My legs almost instantly gave way and everything around me blurred to the point where I all I could make out were shapeless blobs of colour running together. The last thing I recall is asking if I had got blood on the carpet before I blacked out.

---------------------

_Song lyrics- _

**"No Good" **by The Prodigy

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D-Angel: Yep, things are getting serious now... And dramatic. Next chapter soon (since I aim to finish this story soon so I can work on other fics). Thanks for reading and bearing with me so far!

See ya next chapter!

* * *

-D-Angel- 

21/05/07

* * *


	10. Chapter 10

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary: __Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs_

D-Angel: As I promised, here is another update

Tai: Zomg! It hasn't even been a month since chapter 9! Are you ok?

D-Angel: Yes indeed! I just have a lot of free time right now, though oddly I rarely write during the day, I'm more of a night writer, lol.

Matt: Yeh… Anyways, the story!

D-Angel: Oh yeh! Well, here's chapter 10... I hope everyone enjoys!

**Rating:** **M**

**Warnings: **Strong language, Hints of drug usage

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Chapter 10

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'_Here, you can be anything_

_Anything that scares you_

_I think that scares you_

_Here, I've been here before_

_But only by myself_

_ By myself _'  
_  
_

It felt like I was floating, the entire experience felt so surreal and nothing like I had endured before. I could see and hear absolutely nothing; though the rest of my senses were heightened beyond what I knew was normal. There was some strange essence that the gentle force, which was levitating me, was carrying as it carefully embraced me. I was so calm and relaxed during that moment, but at the same time there was something uncanny about it.

I became aware that there was no actual comforting warmth and that I more or less felt like I had just stepped out of a piping hot shower, straight into the Antarctic. Becoming mentally aware that I was in fact in a dreamlike state, I slowly tried to force myself to open my eyelids but they felt like someone had coated them with lead. I started to panic as I tried to move my limbs, though they remained still by my side. Experiencing a mixture of frustration and fear, I tried to scream out, though not one sound escaped from my lips. You know what I actually thought? That somehow I was paralysed because I'd had a brick smashed again the back of my head.

Bloody brilliant.

Almost instantly, as if my thoughts of being wheelchair bound for the rest of my life had triggered it, my eyes flickered open and the first thing I saw was a blurred image of my mum standing over me looking somewhat relieved.

"M…Mum?"

My vision soon cleared and I immediately sat up in the unfamiliar bed I had been sleeping in. I was in a hospital only wearing my underwear with my mum, two police officers and a doctor standing round me.

"I…What's going on?" I asked drowsily before a stinging sensation lashed across the back of my head, instantly reminding me what had happened, though I obviously had no idea how I had got to hospital. The whole situation may have sounded like something out of a television drama, but it was in fact far from glamorous and not really that interesting when you're experiencing it.

"It's alright hun, you're in hospital," my mum stated the obvious.

"I gathered that, but…"

"…You're perfectly fine Taichi Yagami," The doctor interrupted. I suddenly felt more awake after hearing him speak.

"My head was bleeding and I collapsed! How can I be 'perfectly fine?'"

"You just fainted, and it was in no relation to blood loss I can assure you. Yes, the cut was quite bad, but we just cleaned and stitched it up while you were unconscious. We'll need to do further scans today though, just to make sure."

I later heard from my mother that they had almost resorted to shaving the entirety of my hair off around the area of the cut, but my mum (knowing me all too well) firmly told them that I had too much pride in my hair to have it shaved off. It was lucky they were able to sort it out without the need of bringing out the razor.

"You're entitled to press charges against the lad that attacked you," The policeman notified while his female counterpart cocked her notepad in a not-so-subtle gesture, "it was an assault after all."

"I don't want to press charges," I coolly said, my inner reasoning being that it had not been the Yamato that I knew and still actually loved that had almost cracked my skull open. I knew that in the state he was in, he wouldn't have been able to fend for himself in prison.

"Yamato ran off after confessing what he did once you had fainted- he said he was 'really sorry'," my mother explained, before she brushed a hand across my cheek. I flinched. For some reason his apology seemed empty; I probably would have preferred it if he had just left without saying anything.

"You're very fortunate that your friend didn't hit you any harder with that brick..."

Fortunate? I couldn't help but sneer. I wished that the fucking brick had killed me. I figured that death was all that was left for me now that I had lost Yamato. Reflecting on things now, I was barely thinking rationally, but at that time the solution seemed simple. I thought about how easy it would be to take my own life- a quick slice of the wrist, followed by eternal bliss. _Suicide._

I stood on the edge of the platform at Odaiba train station a day after I had left hospital, occasionally glancing up at the clock while it counted down to the moment where I would be freed of pain. A small breeze finally brushed by me, the train was approaching the platform in the distance. I shut my eyes and prepared myself.

I almost jumped off the platform prematurely as a hand landed heavily on my shoulder before pulling me away from the edge.

"Tai!" It was Daisuke. His eyes were filled with such concern, I was aware that he idolised me and it must have been awful to see me like I was (and to almost witness what I was about to do). I still cursed inwardly as the train pulled up next to us, annoyed that I would have to wait for another ten minutes for the next one.

"You ok? You looked like you were about to fall off the platform."

Daisuke was not exactly the pick of the litter; he could be rather dense at times. However, I was kind of pleased that he hadn't worked out that I had intended to fall off the platform.

"I'm fine," I said, perhaps a little too abrupt. One of Daisuke eyebrows rose arrogantly, and I was aware I'd managed to offend him.

"Sorry," I quickly sighed when he was about to respond, then we had to quickly move out the way to the side of the platform as a mob of passengers fought their way on and off the train. Daisuke seemed far more relaxed as we sat down on a nearby bench.

"No worries Tai, you've had a lot of hassle, Miyako told me."

News often spread fast around our gang and I assumed Miyako had heard about Yamato and the drugs through Sora and Mimi. I wasn't particularly in the mood to talk about what was troubling me; I really didn't think most people would after a friend had prevented them for committing suicide without realizing it.

"Where you off to?"

"Oh, Ken split up with Miyako," Daisuke explained, "I have to keep travelling between here and Tomachi to try and get them on talking terms again."

If only my problems were that simple, I thought, though to them it probably wasn't. The three of them were so close-knit; it was a surprise to hear that something was troubling them. I guess I learnt then that I wasn't the only one with issues and I felt stupid for almost killing myself.

"They've split?"

"Yeah, it's all rather complicated," Dai groaned, "not even I know exactly what's going on."

We spoke about Miyako and Ken until the next train arrived, though several times throughout the conversation Daisuke had asked me awkward questions in relation to Yama. I had answered them as briefly and dismissively as I was able to.

"Take care of yourself," Daisuke whispered as he unexpectedly pulled me into a hug (most people were aware that he wasn't really the hugging sort). He blushed when he saw my surprised expression and quickly moved his arms away from me. I had to admit, it made him look rather cute. I probably would have fallen for him if he hadn't been four years younger, and if I hadn't known Yamato beforehand.

I gingerly placed a hand on his shoulder and forced a smile to appear on my face.

"Don't worry about me Dai, I'll be just fine." Though we both knew I was lying.

----------------

I came to an agonizing decision to officially state to Sora and my other close friends that I was no longer with Yamato. Everyone of them were so shocked they just stared at me in silence for five or so minutes, as if waiting for a punch line, before noticing I was actually being serious. I don't think that they were aware as me of just how bad Yama's drug addiction was getting. I never told them he had cheated on me since it was something I was probably trying to deny.

"You've done all you can Tai," Sora said as placed a plate with a chicken salad baguette resting on it in front of me. I felt a familiar wave of nausea creep across my stomach as the distinctive aroma of cooked chicken wafted around my nose. "As much as I hate seeing Matt in such a state, there's little that can be done when he can't accept the help we're trying to offer him."

"I don't want to sit back and watch him slowly kill himself though," I added while picking at the bread of my baguette, while Sora monitored my actions like a hawk. Her thoughts must have been screaming _'hypocrite!'_, or maybe, like me, she was unable to think of the right words to say without offending me. I guess it proved that even close friends have a limit to what they can say to one another.

In a way, I'm glad some people (mostly relatives) have the nerve to speak their mind during a moment of crisis, even if it means hurting the other person. I walked into the kitchen a few days before I had to return to school to get another glass of water. I recall wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of my favourite jeans that had suspiciously become easier to put on (I assumed it was because I had stretched them). I noticed that my mum was staring at me- in what seemed like surprise. She then asked me if I wanted any dinner, before she went ahead and started to pull her bright red cooking utensils out from the side cabinets.

"No thanks," I replied while watching the water gush out the kitchen tap as it filled up my glass, "I'm busy finishing off an assignment that's due in when I go back to school."

I almost jumped out my skin as I suddenly heard the clattering of pots and pans falling onto the ground.

"Dammit Taichi, you need to eat something!" My mum cried, "You're becoming skin and bones."

Me? Skinny? I couldn't take her comment seriously at first. Last I checked I was at a healthy weight, perhaps a little overweight though mostly due to my increase of muscle bulk thanks to my years of football playing. Leaving the tap running, I muttered something about needing a shower before I hurried into the bathroom and slipped out of my clothing to investigate my body in the full length mirror. I was immediately sickened by the image that was gazing back at me.

"Shit."

I looked awful. I weighed almost a stone less than I remembered and it seemed I had grown a couple of feet taller without realizing it. My muscle definition still remained, though the outline of my ribs and shoulder blades could be seen ever so slightly. Not only did I look undernourished I also had grey circles underneath my eyes, and my eyes themselves seemed dull and sullen.

I knew what my appearance was the result of. It was the result of worrying over Yamato like crazy and in the process ignoring the fact that I wasn't looking after myself properly. Still, it wasn't as if I'd suddenly be able to magically feel better and scoff down anything and everything that was placed in front of me. Despite realizing my lack of sleep and food were fucking up my mind and body, I was still unable to sleep or eat properly for quite a while, even though I forced myself.

Slipping into my school uniform, the night before I had to return to school, I was ashamed with just how baggy my trousers and shirt were on me. It was annoying that my trousers refused to stay up without the use of a belt (I really hated wearing belts, they just feel horribly constricting). I absolutely dreaded going back to school. I knew it was going to be very different now that Yamato and I were no longer together; people would question why we had broken up, some would coo in fake sympathy while others would just mutter that it was obvious it was going to happen sooner or later.

However, I never expected Mr. Fuji to be one of those people.

"Yagami, tuck that shirt in!" The dragon barked the moment I had stepped out of the boy's toilets. I inwardly sighed in frustration before I lazily tucked the material of my shirt into my trousers, half-expecting him to yell at me for something else afterwards.

"Where's Ishida?" He unexpectedly asked as he peered over my shoulder, as if expecting to see Yamato crouching behind me, or something. I shrugged sluggishly, mainly due to my lack of sleep, which had been responsible for me dozing off in quite a few lessons that day. Mr. Fuji studied the dark bags which I knew were underneath my bloodshot eyes (from watching too much late night television when I was unable to sleep), before he lowered his glasses thoughtfully.

"Perhaps it isn't my business, but has something happened between you and Ishida?" Mr. Fuji quietly questioned, his usual stern voice had been replaced with a more casual tone suddenly making me realize that he was actually concerned that something wasn't quite right involving my personal life. I'm not exactly sure why I did, but I slowly nodded my head before muttering that Yamato had something to do with why I felt and looked like crap. He then asked if I wanted to talk to him privately in his office and for some reason I said yes.

Previously I had only been to Mr. Fuji's office because I'd been in trouble for doing something immature or childish, so it felt strange being asked to sit down on one of the comfy chairs (I was used to standing by the desk while my punishment was dished out to me). He handed me a cup of water from his personal water dispenser, which I gladly downed, before he sat down on his own chair and laced his fingers together.

"What's happened between you two then?"

I pretty much told him the whole story, though I carefully missed out chunks that either I knew Yamato wouldn't want me to say to Mr. Fuji or just things I knew could land him in trouble. I must have told a convincing story because Mr. Fuji sat in dead silence for a few minutes once I had finally stopped speaking.

"Sounds like you've had an eventful summer," Mr. Fuji finally stated before he took another sip of his own water before eyeing me again in sympathy, "It's not nice to hear that you and Yamato have drifted apart because of everything…"

"…I just hate how he's changed so much, though I know it's not all his fault…"

"…People _do _change Yagami; nothing stays the same way forever. We all get old and die eventually, as morbid as it sounds. Nothing is forever."

_Nothing is forever?_ Mr. Fuji was right. The words still played on my brain as I stood up and thanked Mr. Fuji for taking time out to chat to me.

"I'll be monitoring you and Yamato carefully from now onwards; you're in a bad enough state as it is, so I dread to think what Ishida is like especially after losing his brother."

"I'm fine," I openly lied despite knowing that my appearance was a dead giveaway, "I'm just concerned about Yamato."

I saw Yamato just before my final lesson of the day. I hardly recognized him as he walked towards me. His eyes were grey and sunken and apparent black rings surrounded his eyes. It didn't take an expert to notice that he was unhealthily skinny; the sight of his hollow cheekbones and bony fingers as he ran his fingers through his lifeless blonde hair sent a harsh shiver down my spine. He seriously made _me _look overweight.

I hated him so much, yet I still loved him like crazy. I couldn't help but feel sorry for him, in fact I just wanted to hug him tightly; but in his frail and delicate looking state I was afraid I would accidentally crush him. So instead I quickly turned around and ran and ran, until I was out of school premises. I leant against a nearby wall to catch my breath while I gazed over my shoulder just to make sure Yama hadn't followed me. I managed to sniff back my tears and slid a cigarette between my lips while I fumbled around in my pocket for a lighter.

Looking back on things now, maybe I should have at least told Mr. Fuji that Yama was experimenting with hard drugs. It could have prevented the drama that was yet to come.

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_Song lyrics- _

**"Just Watch the Fireworks" **by Jimmy Eat World

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D-Angel: Another angst-filled chapter complete, and unfortunately only 3 or so more chapters to go! But fear not, I have other stories, lol. The next chapter should hopefully be out by the end of June, if not the beginning of my birth month (July).

Tai: Hope you stick to your regular updates promise! I'm bored of being depressed and underweight.

Matt: _-rolls eyes- _You're not really, baka… You're just acting for this story

D-Angel: Yes, you two are my special yaoi minions _–pets-_ Anyways, my lovely readers, thank you for taking your time to read this chapter (and the ones before of course). Your reviews have truthfully kept me going for so long, and they make me dance around and smile. So yeh, thanks a lot!  
See ya next chapter!

* * *

-D-Angel- 

12/06/07


	11. Chapter 11

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Blehs, took me a while, but here's another chapter! I've been a busy girly hunting for a real job, and I haven't really had much motivation to write (though I have started a new Taito-ish story, but I doubt you'll be seeing that on this website anytime soon). I hopes you like anyway… I feel that I rushed parts of this chapter, so I'm sorry if it's of poor quality- It's 4.30am and I am tired. Read on anyways if you wish :P

**Rating:** **M**

**Warnings:** Strong language, rape, drug usage

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Chapter 11  


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"Jesus Tai, you're playing like a cripple!" Kano yelled as I accidentally kicked the ball into the path of our opposition. I harshly swore back at him before marching off the pitch in a huff. Football practice had become such a trial since I'd been unwillingly depriving my body of its essential needs. I had nowhere near the amount of stamina that I had before the summer holidays. I wouldn't have been surprised if my team had suspended me from participating in tournaments we had lined up that term.

Once I had reached the locker room I took a swig of my water bottle before I picked up my bag and slung it over my shoulder. As I turned around I flinched in surprise when I saw that one of my team mates had been standing right behind me.

"Fucking hell Haru, you scared the crap out of me."

Haru and I were close friends at one stage during our childhood, but as I had become closer to Matt, Haru and I had drifted apart until we eventually became casual friends. We only really spoke at football practice, and sometimes around school if we happened to bump into each another. He was a friendly guy, though he was rather modest and shy, but he did admittedly kick ass when it came to football (Though he was nowhere near as good as me!). Still, I hadn't spoke to him at all over summer, and I had barely had the chance to catch up with him during the past couple of weeks we'd been back at school.

"Sorry man," Haru instantly replied before he blushed and gazed down at the muddy tiled flooring for a few seconds, "I just wanted to make sure you were ok." He lifted his head up again, "It was way out of order of Kano to shout at you like that."

"He's never liked me anyways, especially after finding out I was a fag," I replied truthfully before I started to walk towards the door, "I seriously don't have the energy to deal with him right now."

As I went to pull the door open I sensed that Haru was walking towards me, so I spun back round. He stopped in mid-motion and gazed at me hopelessly with his wide grey eyes.

"Tai, I…"

I saw the shimmer in his eyes and cautiously raised an eyebrow.

"I…" Haru then swore under his breath before he smiled sheepishly and ran a hand across his brow, "just take things easy, I'll catch ya later, k?" I nodded vaguely and half-smiled before I made my exit.

I'd never seen Haru act so strange and uncomfortable round me before and at the time I couldn't think why he'd be like that. Maybe he knew about Yamato and his drugs and assumed that I was becoming an addict (I wasn't really far off looking like one). I soon dismissed that thought when I realized how idiotic it sounded. However, it almost became true against my will.

----------------

I bumped into Junzo as I was walking up the apartment block stairwell. He told me to wait a minute as I was about to march on straight past him, and I idiotically listened to him. Maybe I was expecting an apology? Hell knows why…

"What?" I asked aggressively while he eyed my dishevelled appearance up and down. He then smirked in such a way it instantly unnerved me.

"Yama's good in bed," Junzo dirtily stated as he placed a cigarette between those vile greying lips of his. That comment instantly drove me over the edge, I screamed out in frustration as I threw my fist towards his face. I floored him in one, though I never looked back to view the damage I had done to his face. Hell, I think I improved it more than anything. I thought that would be the end of it anyways. But as usual, I was proved wrong. When I was coming back home late from the first football match of the term, Yamato did the unexpected.

I was slightly tipsy after having a couple of drinks to celebrate our victory. I was ecstatic that we had won, especially since our opponents were crushing us by three to nil by half-time. I blamed myself though since I was nowhere near as good as I was before out summer break.

"You're smoking again, aren't you Yagami?" My coach had noticed once the half-time whistle had blown and I was clearly more out of breath than the non-smokers in our team. I shamefully nodded while I gulped down a few mouthfuls of luke-warm water. He didn't grill me further though since I knew he realized I was stressed out and genuinely not very well. As I walked up the apartment complex's stone stairwell, I decided that I would go straight to sleep once I was home as a yawn escaped from my mouth. I grimaced a little when I tasted the alcohol from earlier which was teasing my tongue.

"Taichi," Yama's voice penetrated the quiet atmosphere and immediately made me turn around.

He was standing by his apartment door which was slight ajar, and there was an abnormal look across his face, his eyes hardly seemed focus and there was a shocking pale white tone to his skin. He looked far more skeletal than he did the last time I had seen him- he must have weighed no more than eight or so stone. I had almost walked straight past him since I had simply not recognized him.

"I…" He fidgeted uneasily with his mobile phone in his hand, "I have some of your belongings in my room." I frowned and narrowed my eyes suspiciously since registering that he had called me by my full name (something he had rarely done up until then), until he abruptly stopped playing with his phone and stared directly at me with his dilated pupils. A delicate shiver ran up my spine as I was unable to move or even speak for a few moments, until I realized that he was after a response. I could blame the alcohol, or just my general irrationality, but I decided that since I was there I should grab the stuff that belonged to me; then I could avoid him as much as possible while I attempted to patch up my own problems.

He followed closely behind as I stepped into the apartment, casually making my way towards his bedroom to reclaim my clothes and other personal belongings I had left at his. I felt safe and secure knowing that all I had to do was collect what I needed, and Yamato seemed reasonably sober compared to the past few times I had seen and spoken to him. It was probably, however, the alcohol that had given me those nerve of steels.

A lot of thoughts raced through my mind (like they often did while I was drunk) while I was approaching Yamato's bedroom. Did he have any intention of chatting to me about the reason why he'd been cheating on me? Or did he just need me for one of his drugged sex experiments? But, there was just one thought that I neglected. Why would he have been hanging about outside late at night just waiting for me to return just to tell me he still had some of my stuff? Such suspicion would have surely triggered the alarm bells in my mind that could have saved me from an unnecessary ordeal. Beautiful thing, hindsight.

The moment I stepped into the bedroom the door instantly slammed shut behind me and two foreign pairs of arms grabbed my shirt roughly and flung me hard onto the floor. My jaw cracked painfully against Matt's chest of drawers as I fell and I groaned in pain- I was certain I'd broken it but obviously my attackers didn't give a damn. A heavy object struck against my back before I could scramble to feet and I whimpered loudly. When I was hit again (this time on the back of my legs) I obediently stopped resisting but also refused to cry out in agony.

"That's right," a sly voice whispered, "stay still and quiet, pretty boy, and we won't hurt you as much."

"Screw that," I heard Junzo's distinctive tone sneer, before I felt the object (which I later learnt was a baseball bat) smash against my back again. "I _want _him to suffer."

My arms were harshly grabbed and pulled behind my back allowing them to tie my wrists together with some sort of silky fabric. The same material was then used to tie my legs together so that I was completely vulnerable and at their mercy. I remember trying to wiggle free, but when Junzo struck the bat harshly against one of my shoulders I decided to stop.

The knife cut straight through the material of my shirt and easily sliced through my skin, making me wince in discomfort. When they started to cut through my jeans, it was clear- they wanted to rape me, and it was just out of spite since I had hit Junzo.

"We should get Yamato in here to watch this," He chuckled once he had torn my boxers from my body. I shivered the cold atmosphere assaulted my newly exposed flesh and I felt like I was going to vomit. To them this was just a big game and there was no way they would go easy on me.

"You deserve this you fucking slut!" Junzo growled before he spat on my face. I must have unsettled everyone when I started to laugh almost mockingly (mostly out of my own fear) before I told them- loud enough so they could hear- to enjoy themselves. My blatant outburst of raw arrogance earned me a hard punch against the back of my neck which dazed me for a good few seconds, though I still heard the ominous sound of Junzo unzipping his trousers. However, he climbed off my back seconds later.

Someone had called Yamato into the room, well, either that or his guilt for setting me up had become so overwhelming that he didn't want such agony to be inflicted on me. I was never told what truthfully happened then, but I could somehow sense that he was pissed off despite I couldn't see him, since my eyes were staring at the carpet.

"Ah, just in time for the show," Junzo exclaimed, as if talking about some sort of circus act. "Take a seat…"

"…No, you've had your fun, now get the fuck out!" Yamato snapped loudly.

I half expected them to ignore Yama's shouting and continue to assault me, but to my surprise they all muttered in irritation while they stepped away from me, before I heard them slowly trudge out the room. A heavy silence replaced their sadistic laughing and loud breathing, and a heavy weight of tension descended.

"Yamato?" I quietly questioned when I became aware that he was kneeling down besides me. I was unknowingly shivering in fear from everything that had happened from the very second I had trustingly set foot in his bedroom. He pushed me onto to my back and I trembled evidently when I saw that his lips were curled up into a small stoner's grin. The way he had just changed emotions was so surreal it was scary.

"Try this," Yamato eagerly said. I hardly had a say in the matter as he almost immediately pierced the sharp needle through one of the veins in my wrist. A small whining noise escaped from my parted lips as I felt the unknown substance squirt into my bloodstream. I shuddered in discomfort as Matt's hand tried to soothingly brush against my cheek once the needle had been pulled out from my wrist. I wondered what the hell I'd been injected with.

I'm not going to deny it, the warm feeling of security and pleasure the substance gave me was far supreme compared to any orgasm that I had experienced. Whatever he had injected into my blood, it made me feel far more alert and animated. I wanted to jump up and run around, or at least do something that involved being energetic; but it was impossible to even stand up with my hands and feet still being tied up. When Yamato rolled me onto my stomach I suddenly realized what he wanted from me.

"Junzo's crap compared to you," he admitted in a breathless voice while he quickly wiggled out off his jeans. He then ran one hand excitedly across my buttocks while he stretched me with two saliva soaked fingers.

Then, he slid into me.

I'll never forget the pungent stench of his body odour (he must have not showered in over a week), and the amplified sensation of uneasiness as his warm breath panted against the back of the neck- a feeling that, only a few months ago, used to turned me on.

The ordeal went on forever, but eventually the greedy feeling of pleasure falsely engulfed me while my legs and stomach were painfully chaffing up against the carpet. I knew that I wasn't going to climax; Yamato was far more aroused than me. I felt his sticky, warm liquid spurt against my sensitive inner walls while some trickled quickly down my thighs. He moaned loudly and arched his body back a little and dug his long fingernails into me as he experienced the intense orgasm that he had hoped for. After one final tremble he heavily collapsed onto my blood-covered and sweaty back, and a small pained gasp fell from my mouth as I was temporarily winded. Yamato must have mistaken it for a moan of satisfaction because he started to laugh hauntingly.

"That, was… amazing…"

To me it had just been raw sex with not a trace of love. The drug had only _just _made it bearable for me by masking out the horrific reality of what my best friend had done to me. Yet, I never saw it as rape- but I knew I would find it near enough impossible to forgive him for it. I was later told that he had been smoking cocaine, and he had injected both of us with crystal meth (or simply- speed). Learning that he was mixing drugs made the constant knots of anxiety in my stomach bind tighter than ever before.

He soon climbed off me and I laid there in the same spot while the effects of the drug started to lessen. Matt soon fell asleep on his bed. He left me aching all over with a numb sensation present in my abdomen. I was desperate to escape from the vile stench of sweat, drugs and sex in the small room that my nose had still not adjusted to, but since I had been left with my hands and feet tied tightly together I would have to wait another agonizing four hours until I would be untied. Even after that, I remained sprawled across the carpet for another hour, feeling so physically drained that I was unable to even move an inch.

It was, funnily enough, through that experience I somehow understood why he chose to poison his body with drugs. They blocked out the mental anguish of the harrowing reality that had gradually become too much for him. Unfortunately by doing so he had buried away the Yamato I had fallen in love with.

_If I turn into another,_

_Dig me out from under what is covering _

_The better part of me_

I woke up to his singing, that heavenly voice (with a clear edge of sleepiness) which for a moment made me feel safe and secure, until the pain from earlier crashed down on me again like a ton of books. I somehow managed to sit up, and as I did his singing stopped. He watched groggily as I rose unsteadily to my feet, flinching in apparent pain as I made my way to the door. I heard a suspicious rustling sound followed by the creaking of the bed springs as he hopped off the bed with, what I assumed were drugs, in his hands.

"Want some?" He offered, and I assumed at the time it was his way of apologizing, though he later said that it was his attempt of masking out his guilt. Still, I completely ignored his question and quietly said I was going to use the bathroom before I limped out the room.

I didn't dare check the mirror as I walked past it before I feebly stepped into the shower cubicle and pulled the doors shut. I sighed in a mixture of relief and anguish when the cold water sprayed out from the showerhead onto my burning skin. I slowly slid down against the wall in defeat while I placed one hand against my throbbing head. Everything had gone beyond my control; my life was unwillingly spiralling into an unknown vortex and I was certain the worse was still to come.

_----------------_

___Sing this song,_

___ Remind me that we'll always have each other_

___ When everything else is gone_

_---------------------_

___Song lyrics- _

_**"Dig" **_by Incubus

_---------------------_

_D-Angel: _Enough angst? Jesus, I'm truly sadistic. Ah well. Another couple of chapters to go... 2-3 me thinks! Then I'll work on Shattered Illusions, and probably a Cup of Lust (Behind Closed Doors can wait). Erm yeh, next chapter will be up as soon as possible, honestly! Give me a couple of weeks since I'm spending the week with my boyfriend next week _ / does happy dance\ ._ Oh, and if you spot any spelling or grammatical errors, or anything that sounds strange, then let me know! I lack the time to proof-read my work, mostly because I am lazy, lol.

Thanks for reading anyways, and for all the reviews! You guys are ace :)  
See ya next chapter!

* * *

-D-Angel- 

05/08/07

(Was my birthday last week, lol, I am getting old now...)


	12. Chapter 12

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: I am alive (hardly) with another chapter, which has been sitting 'almost' complete on my laptop for the past two months, so I've managed to find time and motivation to finish it and post it up before 2008. Feel free to laugh at the Grammar and spelling errors for I'm sure there are many. I hope you enjoy all the same while I go sleep, and then afterwards work non-stop on my University work for the next month... /cries/

**Rating:** **M**

**Warnings:** Strong language, drugs

  


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Chapter 12

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The wind was howling through the small un-sealed gap of my balcony door, destroying any hope of sleep I was desperate to get. I threw the covers off me in defeat before I clambered out of bed and ventured into the kitchen. I automatically grabbed a glass from the drying rack by the sink, and then filled it up with water before downing the liquid in one giant gulp.

"I need a smoke," I sighed silently, and left the room to go hunt for the nearest pack of cigarettes. As I was desperately digging around down the sides of the sofa, I heard my phone vibrate loudly against the coffee table's surface next to me. I immediately grabbed the phone and my hand started to tremble when I saw that it was a text from Yamato.

_Want to meet by the lake in the park after my gig tomorrow? Yama x_

I wasn't sure what to reply at first, he hadn't text me or attempted to phone since he had become a proper drug addict. I wondered if there was a chance he had finally decided to go cold turkey, and perhaps he was backing away from the drugs after what had happened- after everything we had spoken about the week before. Even still, could I trust him? I must have spent over an hour deciding whether to reply, and I somehow ended up back in my bed, staring at Yama's text while the early flood of faint morning light started to fill the room. I eventually replied with a simple '_Yeah ok.' _

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I was late for the concert. Somehow I had fallen asleep in the bath, and when I had woken up in the freezing cold water, I panicked when noticing I had only five minutes to get dressed and run to Odaiba Park in time to meet up with my friends. Naturally that didn't go according to plan. The gang had obviously already gone to stand and cheer as the front of the crowd, and what was worse that I had been in such a rush that I had forgotten to pick up my mobile from my bedroom. I decided to just slowly edge my way to the front of the crowd in vain that I'd find at least one of my friends before The Teenage Wolves came on stage.

The warm up band were completely rubbish- a bunch of wannabe Goth kids who barely looked older than the age of ten. The lead guitarist was jumping around like a chimpanzee with serious brain trauma, while the other band members appeared to be high on caffeine. By the time they had finished their second song, I was close to murder, especially when I heard that they had chosen the classic Queen song; 'Don't Stop Me Now', as their '_grand finale'. _

"Hey, Chi!" A familiar voice yelled over the wailing emitting from the pre-pubescence brats on stage. I looked to my left and was glad when I saw it was Daisuke.

"Dai! Sorry I was late."

"I've been looking _everywhere _for you, well the whole gang has in fact." He stated with his usual enthusiastic tone before smiling goofily, "Sora wants a word with you…" then he lost his grin as a more serious look appeared on his maturing face, "…and, so do I."

I followed Daisuke away from the main crowd and speakers so we could hear each other more clearly. The poor kid looked quite on edge, like something was troubling him. I knew that feeling all too well. He gazed over at the stage before looking at me again sheepishly.

"There's someone I like, but it's complicated," Daisuke explained while his cheeks flushed light red. "He's still technically involved with someone…" then he paused and groaned that he couldn't believe he had told me he was gay. I shook my head and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"It's fine Dai," then I laughed, "I'm hardly homophobic am I?"

Daisuke smiled, he seemed more at ease than before just through the way he gazed into my eyes for a few moments. I leant towards him without thinking… and then my lips were touching his, full-on contact, for the best of five seconds until I saw sense and pulled my mouth away. Oh god, I could not believe that I kissed Daisuke. His face was a mixed expression of shock and sheer confusion, and as I took a step back he remained frozen in the same position in disbelief.

"Oh…" He finally said before staring down uneasily at the ground. I guess there's not much else a twelve year old can say after being kissed by someone he looks up to. I muttered sorry then rushed off embarrassed, pushing my way through the crowd in attempt to find where my other friends were. The expression on Daisuke's face had also told me that he had a crush on someone else, and it was obvious who now looking back.

I was almost deafened when almost every girl in the audience screamed loudly in a high pitch tone I never knew existed. Finally, The Teenage Wolves came running on stage with their instruments. My eyes were fixed on Yamato, though not to admire how sexy black eyeliner made him look. Even from where I was standing I could see that his lifeless blue eyes were glazed over with false calmness and his pupils were dilated. I knew that it was a sign that he was high. Still he seemed to be scanning the crowd carefully, while he plugged his guitar to the amp, as if he was searching for someone. He was probably looking for me, but it hardly mattered. We had planned to meet up after the concert.

_Maybe he'll rape you again, _a bitter voice hissed in the back of my mind, which I instantly choose to ignore.

The band played a couple of rifts to calm their nerves and to keep the audience entertained as they got into position. Once ready The Teenage Wolves introduced themselves before they started to play their first song; a cover of some American band. Why wasn't Matt using his favourite metallic blue guitar? I wondered, taking note of the not so nice and plain black and white guitar as he strummed and plucked his fingers against the strings. As he started to sing, the whole crowd erupted with cheers and screams. He lived for that- the cries, the applause, the appreciation.

'_Knees are weak,_

_Hands are shaking,_

_I can't breathe...'_

Yama's voice breezed dramatically down the microphone as he reached the chorus, while he gripped the microphone stand tightly.

'_So, give me the drug_

_Keep me alive_

_Give me what's left of my life_

_But let me go_

_Pull this plug_

_Let me breathe_

_On my own I'm finally free_

_Don't let me go'_

I saw Yamato take a deep breath as he started to dart his fingers up and down the frets of his guitar, then he stepped backwards a few paces, away from my view and the microphone. Marco was mouthing something to him in slight frustration, obviously annoyed that the singer had missed the cue for the next verse. The guitar melody started to fade out, until it was just left with Timmy playing the same filler rift over and over. He was hoping in vain that Yama would return to the mike and start singing again, though it was clear that something wasn't right.

My fears were confirmed when there was suddenly a chorus of gasps and screams- the atmosphere became so manic that I could no longer see what was happening up on the stage. I was shoved aside as people in the same position as me wanted to see what all the commotion was about. Finally I saw. Yamato had collapsed. So many people were yelling that he was dead, while others were gasping that he had fainted due to heat exhaustion. My heart was thumping loudly against my ribcage as I attempted to fight my way to the stage, though it was almost impossible to fight my way through the crowd. I yelled out his name, but it was a waste of time; my voice could hardly match the deafening roar of concerned friends and fans.

What had happened? The question was racing frantically through my mind, trying to search for a logical answer (Difficult to do while I was being shoved to and fro by the audience.)

"He looked well stoned when he walked on stage," A voice nearby stated, and I felt the bile in my stomach slowly creep up towards my throat, which I swallowed on reflex. Of course, it was obvious now; Yamato had taken something before he had gone on stage, and whatever it was it had been too strong for him to handle. Those drugs- those fucking drugs had ironically shown Yamato just how lethal they could be during something he enjoyed doing so much. I felt horribly sick when I suddenly realized that they may have killed him, that he was lying dead on stage in front of his fans, and friends. The thought completely paralysed me, I was unable to even move an inch while silent crystal tears welled up in my eyes. Things had ironically started to look bright after Yama had set me up. Tears continued to fall down my pale cheeks as I was reminded of the conversation Yama and I had a couple of nights after that horrific incident.

He had turned up at my house unexpected, but for once he was sober. I was still cautious about letting him in, but he eventually persuaded me to hear what he had to say. It was worth listening too, despite how much it hurt.

"I know that what I did can't be excused, even if I wasn't fully in control at the time." He opened his eyes and stared straight at me. "In the end, I took the drugs- it was my choice, and I regret every moment of it."

"I need help," Yamato confessed as he fiddled with my lighter on the dining room table. A silent tear slid down his pale face making him look vulnerable. He was shaking too; I suspected he feared what the near future had in store for him.

"Yama…" I breathed his name out, as if it was natural. He looked back up at me with a lustful glimmer in his eyes. There wasn't much I could say, but I knew I had to say something.

"I…Me and the gang, we're willing to help you," I was certain I was speaking gibberish, that he couldn't understand me since my voice was trembling, so I decided to speak from the heart. "It kills me to see you like this…"

Yamato was gazing at me in concern; he heard my voice break after every word that'd fallen from my lips, like desperate raindrops crashing against the ground. For one surreal minute I wanted to feel his soft lips on mine again, however I soon broke away from my wishful thinking when he finally replied.

"I'm really sorry, Chi." He sounded genuine, but I knew not to hug him like I used to; we were friends now, not lovers. I had never heard him sound so mature and serious before in my life, and it was the first time we had bonded in what felt like months. And now, this had happened…

I fell to my knees and started sobbing loudly, until I was pulled to my feet and dragged out of the distressed crowd. I didn't protest, I would not have even cared if it had been a mass murderer or a sadomasochist rapist- I just felt better being away from the cries of various strangers that the guy I loved was dead.

Through my blurred vision I saw the shapes of Sora and Koushiro as they led me to a nearby bench where our other friends were. Mimi was in hysterics while Miyako was attempting to calm her down. The others immediately stared at me with similar looks of sorrow and sympathy. Jyou then rushed over- apparently he'd been talking to the paramedics.

"They're allowing one of his band mates to get on the ambulance with him," Jyou explained nervously, "That's it."

"He'll be fine," Daisuke reassured, though he was clearly trembling in shock, knowing that the whole situation was more than serious. Ken wrapped his arms tightly round the younger boy in hope to calm him down.

"Take me to the hospital," I whimpered just seconds later, clinging desperately onto Jyou. He warily stared at the rest of our friends before he looked back at me, biting down awkwardly on his bottom lip.

"I… I don't have my car."

I released my grip on Jyou before I glanced over at Sora, whose face was unusually pale. Her eyes quivered with slight anticipation for a moment before she took a step forward and grabbed my arm.

"Lets try and grab a taxi, if not, we can go by foot."

Such a quick thinker in any situation, I completely loved that girl. We managed to get a taxi, and, well, I honestly don't remember anything else until we arrived at the hospital.

_---------------------_

___Song lyrics- _

_**"Injection" **_by Rise Against

_---------------------_

_D-Angel: _Yep, can't live without the drama, even though it's cruel. I think there's only two more chapters left now, I'm sure as hell not writing anymore than that :P  
Expect the next update in February because seriously, I have 5 or so deadlines for my University assignments on the last week of January, so I'll rarely have time to do the things I love most. Hope you all have a grand New Year anyway D

Thanks for reading, see ya next chapter!

* * *

-D-Angel- 

29/12/07


	13. Chapter 13

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Hey, finally managed to get around to finishing this chapter! Eugh university is very time consuming, and I had a cold last week, grrr, but I'm a lot better now (despite I have a lot of work to do over the Easter holidays before I go to Italy for a week!). Still, enjoy this chapter... Apologies if it's a tad on the short side!

**Rating:** **M**

---------------------  


Chapter 13

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I didn't want to make a scene, but all eyes were on me the moment I ran into the accident and emergency waiting area with Sora following. My trainers squeaked horrifically against the newly polished flooring as I rushed over to a middle-aged nurse, who was about to push a trolley full of medicines out through a set of double doors.

"Do you know where Yama is?" I asked frantically, while the nurse stared at me blankly, understandably having no idea of what or even who I was talking about. Sora suggested that we should sit down and wait as she went to grab my arm.

"Yamato!" I exclaimed growing frustrated as the nurse continued to look at me. I was just about ready to go running off down the corridors until I found him myself, however a strong hand landed on my shoulder. To my horror, it was security. Sora tried hard to reason with them, explaining what had happened and why I was acting completely deranged, but they firmly stated that it was best we all went outside for a bit.

"Wait, wait!" It was Yamato's band mate, Timmy. He'd been sitting in A&E watching in embarrassment as I'd made my less than glamorous entrance with Sora. The security guards stopped walking as Timmy stood in front of them. I struggled free from their grasp and instinctively flung my arms around Timmy.

"Is he ok?" I asked while trembling in fear. I didn't want to hear the answer; hell knows why I even asked. Timmy soothingly rubbed my back and urged me to calm down before he led me and Sora over to a few empty seats in the corner. The security guards stood nearby with full acknowledgement that, at the time, my sanity was hanging by a thread.

"As far as I'm aware, he's alive, but it's touch-and-go," Timmy explained while I held back my tears. Sora took my hand and reassuringly squeezed it, though I had never known her to be this quiet before. One of our closest friends was in a critical condition though, so it was no wonder why no one was acting like their usual selves.

"What happened? What did Yama take?" I asked knowing all too well Yamato's collapse on stage was drug related.

"Speed," Timmy said as a solemn look appeared in his soft blue eyes, "twice the amount his body could physically handle."

That idiot, why did he turn back to the substance he hated to love?

"He was apprehensive; often gets that way just before we go out on stage, but he seemed to have something playing on his mind. He kept checking his phone."

Was it because of me? I thought, was he worried that I was going to stand him up after the concert despite our arrangement to meet.

"Yama was _not_looking good when it was time to go out on stage. He even said to me that he was thinking about sitting the first song out." Timmy continued, he ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. "I told him that one song wouldn't kill him… Rather ironic, huh?"

"He's not dead though…" I interrupted sounding more defensive then I would have liked.

"Yet.." Timmy added, then he apologized quickly and shifted awkwardly on his seat. "A similar thing happened in my cousin's band around three years ago- the drummer overdosed on heroin, and it killed him." No it wasn't what I wanted to hear, but it was good of someone to put the situation into a realistic light for once. You just eventually stop listening when everyone keeps saying: 'don't worry, he'll be fine', even when it is just an attempt to stop you from panicking.

Sora and Timmy stayed with me for three hours while I asked any nurse, who entered the room, if I could see Yamato. Most the nurses explained that only family members were allowed to see him for the time being. The last nurse I asked shook her head and said sorry before she periodically looked at Sora and sort of smiled at her. Sora quickly gazed down at the floor and one of my eyebrows arched upwards. I almost asked Sora if everything was ok, but the deafening wails coming from a tired baby a few seats away from ours prevented me.

After a couple of minutes, Sora stood up.

"I can't stay here any longer Tai, it's getting late and I really doubt they'll let us see Yamato any time soon." I frowned but then reframed from making her feel guilty when I saw her nibbling on her bottom lip. I could not put my finger on what was up with her, but she looked paler than usual as if she were about to be sick. I sat up slowly then hugged her tightly while she rested her head against my chest for a few moments.

"I'm sorry Tai, I'll let the others know how he's doing," Sora promised before she waved goodbye to Timmy and I and walked out the waiting room.

"We should really walk her home," Timmy stated as he rose to feet and yawned. "She has a point, we should return here tomorrow."

"No," I replied instinctively and Timmy narrowed his eyes. "Look, please catch up with Sora. I just need to see Matt."

Timmy glanced awkwardly towards the exit then back towards me and rolled his eyes. "Good luck," he muttered before he jogged out the waiting room. I sat back in the uncomfortable plastic chair, skimming my trainers across the plastic flooring for a bit until I received looks from an elderly couple opposite me when my trainers made an irritating screeching noise. I gazed up at the boring white ceiling and started to count the lights.

Another hour passed. I saw the apologetic nurse from earlier re-enter the room and without thinking I rose to my feet and walked over to her.

"Excuse me?"

She smiled at me and asked me what the matter was. I wiped a tear from my eye with my thumb.

"Ah, do you want to know how Ishida-san is doing?"

I shook my head.

"Is there any chance of seeing him today?" I asked.

The nurse sighed and reminded me that only family members were allowed to visit him for now. I felt a heavy sinking feeling in my chest as I pictured Yamato lying in an open coffin, croaking my name before the coffin's lid slammed shut.

"He's my boyfriend!" I cried out, before my heart thumped heavily against my ribcage. I had no idea where those words had come from, they weren't even true anymore. However, the nurse looked at me sympathetically then placed an arm around me before she quickly led me into the nearby corridor. I stood there awkwardly for a few seconds while her eyes scanned up and down the long corridor. She then looked at me with a straight face.

"I'll let you see him, but don't tell _anyone _that I gave you permission," she said in a strict but soft tone of voice. I nodded and quietly thanked her, refraining from giving her a hug. It was really kind of her to lead me to Yama's room; I realized she was risking her job for me. She placed a hand gently on my shoulder once we had reached the room and said I could have ten minutes alone with him before she pushed the door open, allowing me to walk in.

As the door shut an inaudible whimper tumbled from my parted lips as my eyes rested upon Yamato lying silently in that hospital bed. The only sound was the ominous beeping and humming from the machines that were monitoring his blood pressure and such (well, I'm not exactly a doctor). I walked towards the bed then peered down to examine his angelic face, paler than I'd ever seen it before, almost pristine white. He looked so peaceful I wouldn't have been at all surprised if the nurse had walked back in to announce his death. His chest was slowly moving up and down though, proving he had a will to fight.

I soon realized it was a sight I had not wanted to see. He couldn't even talk and he probably wouldn't hear the things I was desperate to say_. I love you, you're my everything so please don't die._ I gazed at him willing for him to open his eyes, but his eyelids didn't even make the smallest flicker. I sighed softly as I knelt by his bed, then rested my head on the mattress and closed my own eyes. It barely felt like a minute had rolled by when the nurse came back in and said that my ten minutes were up but I could visit again tomorrow. I knew it wouldn't be for long though. I guess no amount of time is enough when you're spending it with someone you love.

----------------

The gang went to the hospital everyday for three solid days until they were finally allowed to see him. I did not want to visit him again until he woke up. Sora and Mimi eventually talked me into visiting Yamato with them, a week after he'd fallen into a coma. However, when we were outside the hospital entrance we bumped into Yamato's dad.

"Hi Mr. Ishida," Sora said, and he replied with a small nod before he studied the three of us carefully. I knew for a fact that Yama's friends had visited him in hospital more than what his father had. Of course, Mr. Ishida had his own fair share of issues, but it irritated me that he did not seem bothered about his son being in such a critical condition. Just as I was about to ask how Yamato was doing, Mr. Ishida ran his fingers through his thinning hair then sighed loudly.

"Yamato's awake but he doesn't want anyone visiting him until he's out of hospital," Mr. Ishida stated. I frowned and my lips parted as I readied myself to say something without giving my brain any time to think about what Yamato's father had just said. "He wants to meet with you, Taichi, as soon as he's been dismissed, said he'll give you a call."

I still felt hurt that Yamato did not want me to see him until he was out of hospital, though anyone knew that the blonde haired teen hated anyone he knew seeing him in a state of vulnerability. A part of me was still glad that Yamato had woken up. Sora and Mimi held onto my arms as we walked back to mine. It took me a good few minutes to realise I was shivering while silent crystal tears were slipping down my cheeks. Sora squeezed my arm and Mimi rested her head on my shoulder.

"Shhh," Mimi hushed, "everything will be fine."

----------------

The doorbell chimed the moment I had slumped down on the sofa ready to watch some television. With a groan I rose to my feet and trudged towards the front door. I was surprised to see Haru standing opposite me smiling politely. I was pleased to see him, I had been alone in my apartment since I had woken up so it was nice to have someone pay me a visit. He asked how I was doing after a quick hug before I invited him in.

"I'm a bit better," I smoothed down my t-shirt, while he took off his shoes and followed me into the living room. As I turned around to face him again he handed me a small pile of paperwork he had pulled out from his backpack. I glanced at the pile of paper and arched an eyebrow up before I looked back at Haru.

"Homework," Haru said as he zipped his backpack up.

"Thanks Haru," I then stuck my tongue out, "you could have _accidentally_ dropped it into a bin or something." Haru laughed softly then glanced down at a framed picture of me and Yamato, which I had left on the small table besides the sofa. A saddened twinkle appeared in Haru's eyes before he quietly asked how Yamato was. Most people at school were aware of Yamato's situation, quite a few of my class mates had phoned me during the time I'd been absent to check how both Yamato and I were doing. However, I was aware that Haru and Yamato had never really spoken that much, in fact Haru had once told me that he found Yamato irritating at times though wouldn't say why.

"He's doing ok, in a stable condition and soon to be dismissed from hospital, so I've heard," I replied while my eyes fell to the photo of me and Yamato kissing and my heart sank. Haru nodded then looked down awkwardly at the floor, like he had done in the changing rooms a few weeks ago. Rustling the papers to get Haru's attention he immediately looked up and I, for some reason, asked him if he wanted to do some homework with me. We ended up in my room and lying on my bed side by side talking about football and films mostly, until the conversation took a sudden turn. I trailed off in mid speech when Haru placed his hand on top of mine, lacing our fingers together as my chest suddenly tightened. It was then that I realized why Haru had been acting uneasy and shy around me as of late.

"You and Yama," he whispered while his thumb caressed the back of my hand, "I thought you two would never split up."

I was about to pull my hand away from his and push him off the bed, until he said something that kept me frozen in the same position.

"You still love him though, right?"

"I…" I couldn't tell him the truth, though I was pretty certain he knew that I still did. He let go off my hand while I shut my eyes and tried to hold back my tears. I heard the bed springs creak and assumed he was climbing off the bed. However, the next thing I knew Haru's body was on top and mine and his head was buried into my chest. I really wanted it to feel uneasy and wrong, but it felt the complete opposite, and it kind of excited me.

"Just let me hold you like this for a little while," He said pleadingly as he held me tighter, and I couldn't say no and push him away. It wasn't as if he was forcing himself onto me, or anything. We both fell asleep like that, and admittedly, it was comforting to feel such warmth again.

----------------

_D-Angel_ : My God, only one chapter left! And what a way to end this one... I wasn't sure about adding the final scene between Tai and Haru, but meh. Next chapter will be quite long, not sure in fact if it'll be the "final" chapter (most likely will be though). I have ideas for a sequel, though not sure if I'll have the time to write it, especially since I've already started writing a couple of new Digimon stories (which differ from my usual angst and character suffering stories, lol). Still, hope you guys are enjoying this story! Final (maybe) chapter will be up in April or May (this depends on my university work load at the end of the semester... I'll have a script to write, and a 2,500 short story for two of my final assessments... and I have to design a website, and sit an exam! It's crazy!).

Anyways, thanks for taking your time to read / review! Makes me smile to know that people are taking interest in my "creative" products!  
See ya next chapter!

* * *

-D-Angel- 

08/03/08


	14. Chapter 14

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: Hi, sorry about the delay! I'm not lying when I say that I have been very busy :( A lot of stuff is going on right now, but I'm still doing my best to finish this story and continue other stories.  
This is no longer the final chapter may I just say... I wanted to split it into two parts because I thought I had crammed in too much action and shocking secrets, heh. I hope you enjoy it all the same anyways!

**Rating:** **M**

--

Chapter 14

--

My mum planted a kiss on my forehead before she left for her afternoon job as a barmaid. Daisuke had called me about an hour ago saying he wanted to talk to me. Things had been rather awkward between us since our kiss at Matt's concert. We hadn't really spoken much since, but I knew it was mainly because we had both been busy.

I felt less uneasy when Daisuke had finally shown up. He slumped down onto the sofa and I handed him a glass of water.

"Thanks Tai," he downed the glass in one then wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his t-shirt. I sat down besides him.

"What did you want to talk about?" I asked, half-expecting him to mention the kiss. I was intrigued when he said he wanted to talk about Ken and Miyako, wondering if the two love birds were still squabbling.

"I've had enough of trying to get them to patch things up," Daisuke groaned while he rubbed his temples with the tips of his thumbs. The dark patches underneath his eyes proved that he was at the end of his tether. I knew that he wasn't used to being in the middle of a drama; he was often the one in control…

"Yeah, it's not fair on you," I said as Daisuke's fingers curled around his empty glass.

"Exactly," Daisuke sighed. He glanced up at the ceiling in clear contemplation.

"Dai…" I began, but I stopped talking when a single small tear slipped down his cheek.

"Being the mediator- it's difficult, especially when…well.." Daisuke trailed off for a few seconds before he looked directly at me.

"The thing is, I'm in love with Ken," he confessed. He started to twiddle his thumbs while a small smile appeared on his face. "I love him so much that sometimes I'm too scared to look him in the eye, in case he realizes how I feel."

I was amazed. Not once had I thought that Daisuke had the hots for Ken. Yes, they were close friends, but Ken was _really _into Miyako, as she was _really_ into him; and Daisuke had always been the odd one out because of it.

"I'm what caused them to argue. Miyako gets jealous when Ken and I talk non-stop about football and guy stuff," Daisuke explained before he placed a hand on his forehead.

"I can't help loving him," he sighed, "although I know it's selfish for me to want him..."

"Dai, you're young," I interrupted, "and love doesn't come around easily."

Daisuke nodded. I stood up and paced the room a couple of times before I turned to face Daisuke again.

"Tell him."

Daisuke eyes widened and his jaw almost hit the floor.

"Tell him? I- I can't… I mean, things are messed up as it is. Miyako would hate me if I just made a move on Ken while they're still patching things up."

I shrugged my shoulders.

"Shit happens."

Daisuke frowned. He rose to his feet and I immediately felt guilty when he started to head to the front door. I chased after him, placing a hand on his shoulder before he could reach the latch.

"I'm sorry Dai. I'm rubbish at giving advice- you're the _only _person who ever actually comes to me."

Daisuke spun around; silent tears were falling down his cheeks. Without thinking I pulled him into a hug. He instantly responded by wrapping his arms tightly around my waist.

"You need to have words with both Ken and Miyako, seriously- you can't keep pretending," I groaned while I ran my fingers through his spiky brown hair. I then placed my hands firmly on his shoulders and he looked up at me while he sniffled a little.

"I made the same mistake, Yama made the same mistake- we were too scared of hurting each other, so we kept our problems to ourselves, and it tore us apart."

Daisuke narrowed his eyes.

"But at least you two have something special," he spoke in an earnest tone of voice as he mentioned the bond I shared with Yamato, which no one had ever described accurately before. Come to think of it, not even I knew how to describe it.

"All me and Ken have is football," Daisuke sighed and moved his arms away from my waist.

I shook my head.

"I've seen you two together; you get on so well- I can see how Miyako feels left out sometimes." I admitted before I looked Daisuke in the eyes, "But, it's not right for her to take it out on Ken, or you."

Daisuke cheeks turned a light shade of pink. He looked cute that way, it was a shame about the age gap between us (and of course the fact we both loved other guys). I felt like a paedophile for viewing him as more than a friend. I was curious if Ken had similar feelings for Daisuke; they seemed a lot closer than most male friends I knew. I would have been concerned if I had been Miyako.

I realized that there was more to their strange love triangle than what Daisuke what letting on; it did not take a genius to notice the flaws in his story. I personally could not accept that Miyako and Ken were having spats solely because of Daisuke.

"Seriously, just tell them how you feel," I concluded as I escorted Daisuke towards the door. Daisuke gave me a hug, only this time he didn't blush.

"Thanks Chi," he said with a grin, "I'll let you know how it goes."

I truly hoped all went well for him, he was an awesome kid. I had misunderstood him for a long time- he was pretty grounded and down to earth at the best of times. If anyone deserved a near enough perfect life, it had to be Daisuke.

**--**

I kicked the football into the top right hand corner of the net then punched the air for a third time. It felt good to run around the grass again and even better to score a hat trick. My team congratulated me, including Haru who flashed a tooth-filled grin in my direction. An uneasy shiver etched down my spine.

We continued playing until the sun started to sink into the horizon.

"Say hi to Yamato for me," one of my school friend's said as he pulled on his jacket and patted me on the back. I did not say a word as he walked off, leaving Haru standing by my side.

"Wanna go for a walk?" he asked softly.

"Sure," I responded almost instantly, although I sounded the least bit enthusiastic.

Haru shyly grabbed my hand and laced his fingers with mine. He led me to a covering of trees by the lake; one of my favourite places in the park, since it was often peaceful and away from the prying eyes of passersby's.

He left go off my hand once I was stood with my back against a tree trunk and leant forward tentatively while tilting his head so his lips could press against mine. I stood on the spot stiffly while he placed his arms around my waist. I couldn't get into the kiss, as much as I willed myself to enjoy it. The tongue crawling around my mouth felt foreign, and it tasted a little too minty for my liking. I soon pulled my head back. Haru pulled his arms away from me when he saw the saddened expression on my face.

"This is too soon," I announced. Haru's eyes started to tremble, and I soon realized it was because the sunlight was reflecting off the tears that were forming in the corner of his eyes. I did feel guilty; he was such a lovely guy who had looks most guys would kill for. How could I fall in love again though?

"I understand," Haru sobbed, while he attempted to wipe away his tears with the back of his forearm. I moved away from the tree and gazed over my shoulder, paranoid for some reason that someone I knew was standing by us. I pulled Haru into a warm embrace when I was certain the coast was clear. We stayed like that for just over a minute before I let him go.

"Sorry," I whispered.

He remained stood by the lake staring at his reflection while I ventured back home.

**--**

It was almost the end of October and I hadn't heard from Yamato at all. He'd been out of hospital for over three weeks, so it was clear he just was not prepared to talk to me. It gave me time to catch up with my schoolwork, and look for a part-time job to help support my mother who was juggling three separate jobs.

I groaned as I trudged up the apartment block stairs, my shoulders felt heavy and my feet ached from walking aimlessly around town looking for a place that was willing to hire a worn-out student. I would have continued my search into the next town, but a text from Sora encouraged me to continue my job hunting the following day.

As I walked towards Sora's apartment, I gazed down momentarily at my scruffy trainers, which were half-covered by my frayed jeans. I still hadn't put back on the weight I had lost, and I couldn't afford to buy new clothes that fit.

I knocked loudly on the door, and just seconds later I heard the latch unclick from the other side.

"Oh, hey Tai," Sora greeted me with a startled expression on her face. She side stepped out the way, allowing me to stroll into the lobby. I followed her into her bedroom once I had pulled off my trainers. She hadn't invited me over as such- she'd just sent a text that had asked how I was doing, and briefly mentioned that she hadn't seen much of me recently because she had _a bit of a flu_. I thought it would be a good gesture to go and visit her.

We sat on her bed like old times, talking about the latest news within the group. Koushiro now had a girlfriend, a cheerleader of all things. She was in his maths class and had been struggling to get by, so it was apparent why she had asked him out. Mimi had revealed she had lost her virginity, which didn't come as a surprise- she had always been quite promiscuous, though Sora mentioned that she had been with her current boyfriend for over a year now.

"So, what's happening in the world of Sora?" I joked after gazing at a picture of her and her boyfriend (it was really bad that I couldn't remember his name). Sora shifted uncomfortably on the bed and gazed down at her legs which were dangling over the edge of the mattress. I stared at her through serious eyes, but she avoided my gaze when she lifted her head back up. Sora's eyes seemed to be glazed over, similar to the china doll which sat on one of the highest shelves at the foot of her bed.

"I guess you should know," Sora finally sighed. I almost fell off the bed in shock as she went to lift up her baggy t-shirt, thinking for a moment (for some reason) that she was about to strip completely naked in front of me. However, she looked up at me with wide eyes while my eyes stared in disbelief at her swollen belly. It felt like I had suddenly stepped into an alternative reality, there was no way a smart girl like Sora would have allowed herself to end up as a young mum.

"I've been hiding it for the past two months," she explained as she lowered her t-shirt, "according to the hospital, I'm already four months gone."

I was speechless and yet Sora did not seem to mind. I guess she had predicted what my reaction would be before she had even shown me her pregnant bump. She just swung her legs back onto the bed and looked up at the ceiling lamp.

"I want to keep it, but I know my mum would disown me if I do."

I swallowed a lump in my throat. I wondered if Sora had left it so late to tell me because of all the drama that was occurring with me and Yamato? Then again, it is never easy revealing a secret that is literally life-changing.

"Does your mum know?" I questioned, though the answer was clear- there had been no need for me to ask.

Sora started to fiddle with her necklace, "It's too late for me to have an abortion now."

She then cursed quietly under her breath.

"I'm so stupid," Sora whimpered as she gazed down at her stomach. Tears were beginning to well up in the corner of her eyes. I wrapped my arms around her as she cried; something I had not seen her do since we were twelve when I had kicked a football into her face accidentally. She held me back tightly while she started to sob that she had completely messed her life up.

I had always seen Sora as the wise one, the one who just about anyone could turn to for a piece of sensible advice. But of course, underneath her grown up image was just an average sixteen year old girl that needed guidance of her own.

"No, you're not stupid- we all make mistakes."

She tightened her grip on my t-shirt and sniffed her tears back. There was no doubt the baby's father was her ex-boyfriend, Nobu, and I knew he unfortunately wouldn't help support Sora's unborn child.

"I guess your boyfriend knows."

I felt Sora's head nod against my chest.

"He thinks I should put it up for adoption," Sora mumbled. I ran my fingers through her soft hair.

"I'll stand by you no matter what happens, Sora," I promised

**--**

_D-Angel_ :See what I mean about shocking secrets! I know the teen pregnancy thing has been over done, but I wanted to portray it more in a realistic light instead of glamorizing it (like a couple of recently updated fanfics, which will go unnamed...). And yeh, Tai shot Haru down! It would have been silly to make them a couple me thinks, especially when Tai is still trying to get over Yamato... Who, speaking of which, had no appearance in this chapter!  
Still, only one more chapter to go... And I mean it! It will be sad, so grab some tissues in preparation. If all goes to plan, I will post it up _next week, _before I go on a two week holiday! He he.

Thanks very much for reading, and a big thanks for all the reviews so far!  
See ya next chapter!

* * *

-D-Angel-

23/06/08


	15. Chapter 15

**_Nothing is Forever_**

_Summary:_Yamato and Taichi share a bond that exceeds friendship and challenges the boundaries of love. Their relationship appears to be indestructible, but cracks are starting to appear on the surface. Nothing is forever. Taito/ rape/drugs

D-Angel: So here we finally are... Final chapter, after just over three years (I think) of working on this story. It really does not feel like a month since my last update; I guess being in the Caribbean for 2 weeks can mess with ones mind! Here it is anyways... Partly written in Grenada... The final chapter of NiF!

**Rating:** **M**

* * *

--

Chapter 15

--

It was a day I remember almost vividly. Yamato stood there at my door pale and gaunt but looking as beautiful as ever. A small forced smile appeared on his face before I nodded stiffly and turned my head away. I knew I would have been unable to hold back my tears if I gazed into his comforting azure eyes. It had taken him a month in total, but finally he had phoned me and said that I deserved to see him.

The air was cool and crisp, the aroma of damp concrete was all I smelt when we walked side by side. A small groan escaped from Yamato's lips as he followed my gaze up to the ominous dark clouds looming above us. I knew we thinking the same thing- _great weather._ It appeared we also had the same location in mind. Odaiba Park was pratically empty, apart from a few teenaged couples, and middle aged people walking their dogs.

Yamato and I occasionally glanced at each other. The uneasy expression on his face caused a bubble of anxiety to swell in my stomach. We strolled around the lake and I started to silently reminisce about the times we had fooled about behind the trees. Yamato smiled briefly as he looked at one particular Sakura tree, which had seen things it could have lived without.

We sat down besides that tree in the end. Yamato stretched his legs out before slapping his hands against his thighs as if to say 'well, lets get down to business'. I wasn't sure how to start the conversation. For once in my life I was lost for words.

Yamato shrugged his shoulders then curled his legs towards his body. He hated heavy silences, especially around me. I watched as his eyes became fixed on a duck that was swimming across the lake. As I rifled through my brain for a conversation starter I was aware that time was of an essence; I had promised to do some shopping for my mum, and to phone Sora. Yamato probably had things to do too, though the way he was just gazing idly at a duck suggested otherwise.

When the duck had dunked its head under the water for a third time I took a small breath inwards.

"Did you hear about Sora?" I asked, finally breaking the ice. Yamato snapped out of his trance and raised an eyebrow in curiosity.

"What about her?"

I took a small breath in.

"She's pregnant..."

"Yeah, she told me a few days ago," Yamato admitted sheepishly. I had a gut feeling Yamato already knew, but at least we were talking.

"Shocking, ey?"

Yamato nodded. He drummed his fingers against his kneecaps for a little while. I watched the duck as a rough looking gang of geese approached it. They honked cruelly in his face then chased him as he swam off in the opposite direction.

"Look after Sora, ok?" Yamato said in a serious tone.

"Huh?"

What he said next was unexpected.

"I'm moving away- today. The flat's all packed up."

My heart skipped a beat.

"You're moving?" I repeated. Yamato nodded casually while he gazed up at the grey sky.

"My dad knows a place in the countryside; he's been thinking about moving there for quite some time- said he wanted us to be closer to Takeru."

Why hadn't he mentioned that before? I fell flat on my back- my mind went blank for a few moments while the bubble in my stomach expanded.

"At least now he'll be closer to my mum to keep an eye on her," Yamato said as he chewed on his lower lip. "She's already tried topping herself twice since Takeru's death."

There was barely a trace of apprehension in his voice. No surprise really.

I slowly sat back up when Yamato looked down at me with a still expression on his face. He was trying to lock away his feelings in that shell of his again, but I knew it wouldn't do him any good.

"What about you, Yama?"

A vacant look flashed in his eyes while he lowered his eye line to the grass he was subconsciously tugging out from the damp soil with one of his hands.

"My dad's throwing me into one of those rehab clinics," he quietly explained although I could still hear the anxiety present in his voice. I did sympathize with him, but I felt relieved that something was being done about his drug addiction. I knew that the hospital had kept him in for a few weeks, to help wean him off drugs- but there was obviously only so much help they could provide.

Eventually, Yamato stood up and I followed suit. It had become a lot darker- rain was definitely on the horizon. The Sakura tree's branches croaked painfully in the wind, like an old man struggling to climb of his rocking chair. Yamato's hand brushed against mine out of habit; our fingers almost entwined until we realised what was happening. We continued walking in silence although I had strange phantom-like twitches in my hand. I could in fact feel the soft warmth of Yamato's hand holding mine, despite he was trailing behind me by a couple of feet.

I stopped walking when we reached our special spot- the place where Haru had kissed me, and the only outdoor area where Yamato and I had made love. It felt like such a long time ago now. A small unintentional whimpering sound escaped from the depth of my throat as Yamato stood by my side.

"We had some good times," he said while I started to tremble. I really needed a cigarette, but I soon remembered, as I dug through my coat and jeans pockets, that I had left my only packet on my bedside table (such a horrible feeling).

Yamato leant against a tree and pulled a cigarette box out from his pocket.

"Want one?"

What a saviour I thought. I smiled and took one from the packet. Yamato smiled warmly then tugged a box of matches out from his jeans pocket.

"It's gonna be weird, living a life without you." Yama admitted as he struck a match against the box, successfully lighting it on the first attempt.

"You'll have to get used to it," I sighed as I slid the cigarette between my lips while Yamato lit his own cigarette. He then leant forward, the way he used to do whenever he went to kiss me, but all he did this time was use the burning end of his fag to ignite mine. One final kiss to say goodbye I mused.

"I'll never stop loving you, Chi," Yamato sighed as he ran his slim fingers through a few strands of his hair, while he partly shut his eyes. He then riskily placed a hand on my cheek, and this time I was the one who flinched.

"Please, don't," I uneasily whispered as I tilted my head away from his hand. I did feel bad as a look of hurt appeared in his eyes, but I knew that he didn't expect me to take him back after everything that had happened. He still managed to smile and gave me a small nod. I was shivering and my throat was gradually tightening while another awkward silence clouded over us.

Minutes later, Yamato stubbed his cigarette out on the tree trunk and chucked the butt onto the ground. Rain had started to spit down from the sky. I took one final drag on my cigarette before I threw it onto the grass and stamped on it.

"Lets head back," Yamato said.

We strolled side by side again, only this time all I could smell was Yamato's aftershave. We walked past Haru just as we were approaching the park's gates. He had a football clutched in his hands, which he dropped when he saw me with Yamato. I felt a little guilty, but I strictly told myself not to look back.

As Yamato and I were reaching our apartment block complex he turned his head to the side.

"Was I ever as obvious as Haru?"

I chuckled softly before elbowing Yamato in his ribs.

"You were worse."

Yamato half-smiled. I wondered if he was thinking about the first time we kissed. What a night that had been- I had almost forgot. We had stayed awake for just over six hours straight, groping and kissing. Fourteen years old, and no cracks in the foundation of our relationship. Now we had practically fallen apart- although it was apparent that some structure remained standing. It was a positive thought although I knew not to be naïve.

We reached our floor quicker than I had anticipated. I really wanted another cigarette as I stood by Yamato, who was opening his apartment door.

"Come in for a while," Yamato offered as he peered over his shoulder. I suddenly found myself blushing. He smiled and said in a warming voice that he wanted to play me a song. I hesitated for a minute, remembering what had happened the last time I had set foot into his apartment.

"It's safe," Yamato promised and in the end I followed him in.

Reality hit me square on when I saw the numerous amount of cardboard boxes piled up around the living room. This would be the last time we would ever be together in the place we had discovered our love for one another. Yamato disappeared into his room. I nervously tapped my fingernails against a sealed box as I waited. He returned several seconds later, cradling his electric guitar- not the metallic blue one (I later learnt he had sold it for drug money and regretted doing so afterwards)

We sat down on the carpet, where the sofa had once been before Yama started to strum his fingers gently against the strings of his guitar. I leant back against the wall and listened intently to the lyrics he sang.

_'I felt for sure last night,  
That once we said goodbye;  
No one else will know these lonely dreams,  
No one else will know that part of me.'_

The melody was slow and calm, almost tranquil. Yamato shut his eyes as he continued to sing in a harmonious tone.

___'I'm still driving away,  
And I'm sorry every day.  
I won't always love these selfish things  
I won't always live not stopping'_

His voice began to quiver a little, yet he still managed to maintain the hypnotic rift he was playing on his guitar. My eyes started to water.

___  
_  
_ 'It was my turn to decide  
I knew this was our time  
No one else will have me like you do  
No one else will have me, only you'_

Yamato's guitar harmony faded out when he saw that I was crying. He placed his guitar down next to him then crawled opposite me. I squeezed my eyes shut when he planted a small kiss on my forehead. His affection made my body glow with a reassuring warmth, making me wish that things had turned out perfectly.

_____'You'll sit alone forever  
If you wait for the right time  
What are you hoping for?'_

We walked to my apartment slowly, as if trying to delay what we knew would be our last few moments together for quite some time. I was reluctant to open my door, knowing that once I stepped into the apartment and closed the door Yamato would no longer be part of my life.

The time had come though.

He placed a hand on my shoulder, wishing me good luck as he desperately tried to hold back his tears.

"I'm truly sorry for everything," he sighed taking one final glance at my tear stained face. Then he turned around. Watching him walk away from me was one of the hardest things I had to endure, but I knew it was for the best.

The stress, the anxiety, they ended there. Of course things weren't perfect- they never are- but I was able to look forward since there was no point in wallowing over what could have been. People say that everything goes in full circle, that eventually things can revert back to way they once were. I never believed that. Nothing is forever, that was my philosophy. I thought I would never see Yamato again- too much water underneath the bridge. Things would have been too awkward.

However, Fate drew us together four years later, and although we had grown up and life had changed, neither of us were ready for it.

**--**

_'I'm here I'm now I'm ready______  
Holding on tight,  
Don't give away the end  
The one thing that stays mine'_

**--**

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___Song lyrics-_

_**"23" **_by Jimmy Eat World

_I love 23, tis one of my favourite Jimmy Eat World songs :) Next to Spangle anyways (an awesome cover song on their singles album! Go check it out)_

* * *

D-Angel: Eugh, I hope the ending wasn't too bad! I tried my hardest not to make it sound too corny... Corny is not good. I really enjoyed writing this story, I hopes you guys have found a special place in your hearts for it too, or that you at least believe you didn't waste hours reading this. Lol.

Well, a sequel is in the making, although I can't confirm when it will be posted up because I really want to work on old stories, and a couple of new ones I started writing this year! Be on the look out... Keep checking my profile page for updates!

Thanks very much for reading, will appreciate your wonderful reviews :)

Bai bai for now!

Yamato and Taichi:  Bai!

_(Curtains fall down. Relieved sighs fill the air)_

* * *

-D-Angel-

21/07/08 (I turn 20 in 8 more days! Eeep!)

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